"Ha bee bay to yooooooooo"

Happy Birthday Daddy!

We are so glad you were born...and glad that you being born gives us an excuse to eat "do-nees!"

They Come Like a Thief in the Night...But With Cups

Last night we had our friends Damon and Emmy over for steaks-yum!-and cheesecake-double yum! While we were preparing dinner, David went out to the garage to get some water and he noticed something through the crack of our slightly open garage door. He figured it was something Nathan had done but he quickly realized the truth. He delivered the news to the rest of us inside. I, preparing my oldest child for a long evening of slumber, ran up the stairs and opened Nathan's blinds.

I spied a van-a familiar one-slowly driving down the street by my house. I threw open the window and I heard the victory cry of a woman who had successfully completed her mission.

Oh yes.

I had been cupped.

These women play a mean game. They drove over 12 miles to accomplish their task and they completed it with passion. They even struck numerous others' homes that night-they sure are efficient!

If their goal was just to "cup" me, it was easily accomplished. But something they might not realize is that their mission also made me smile more than I had in awhile. To those who have not yet fell victim, beware! And to the perpetrators: Well played.

The Random Ramblings of a Righteous Rigmogifier

I don't believe in karma but I think the spiders have some special sort of power because ever since I knocked down all their webs in the backyard, I have the itchies.

After being soda-free for a couple of days, I really really love Diet Dr. Pepper

I vacuumed popcorn up the other day and now when I see it sitting in my vacuum canister, it makes me giggle a little bit. If I put regular unpopped kernels in there, would it serve as some sort of an extra dusty popper? And how good is Price Club's return policy if I decided to try it?

On days like today, I am a little too hard on my kids. I am expecting my 3 year old to act like a 29 year old.

I totally made up the word Rigmogifier because I really enjoy alliteration and couldn't think of anything clever.

I can't wait for the Amazing Race to start.

I thought my neighbors were going to knock my door down today when I sat down in the bathroom and my son was yelling for me from the backyard. Yelling things like, "Mommy? Are you home? Mommy? Did you go away?"

Real Simple Magazine came out with a whole line of cleaning materials and now I feel like everything from my mop to my buckets are completely unacceptable and shabby.

I always cry at the end of "Monsters, Inc."

This list is a LOT like Susie's Ten on Tuesday...I didn't mean to be a copycat! Hmmmm, now I have to think of one more thing......

Purchased an 18 pack of Sharpies in all different colors and it is almost all I can think about.

Get a Pencil, You're Gonna Want to Write This One Down

Take a couple slices of this...










Spread on a little bit of this...















Add some of this (but always in a swirly fashion and spread with a knife so it doesn't drip later)

















And don't forget the key ingredient...











...combined sucessfully, you will have the perfect sandwich according to the standards of my resident 3 year old.

More Wrong-ness

"..........Sun Maid Raisins, nothing but grapes and sunshine................"

"No, that's not right. The Sun Maid Raisin girl isn't supposed to talk."

"Yeah. Just shut up and get back up on your box."

This is Not My Bond.

And that is all that will be said about that.

(I think this picture is so controversial that even Michelle can manage a comment.)

The Full VBS Education

"Daddy, I want to sing you a song I learned at PDS"

PDS is actually VBS: Vacation Bible School)

"Okay Nathan, I'm ready."

"The wise man built his house upon the rock.
The wise man built his houose upon the rock.
The wise man built his house upon the rock,
And the rain came tumbling down."

"Wow Nathan, who taught you that song?"

"Miss Stacy did, Daddy.
The Polish man build his house upon the sand.
The Polish man built his house upon the sand.
The Polish man-"

What?

"David, did he just say the Polish Man??"

"Yeah I think he did."







I guess my kid is starting with the Polish jokes at an early age.

Flashback Fridays! Volume 1, Episode 2

This is a picture of my godparents, Ted and Susan Armstrong and me. It was my birthday-10th or 11th I think. I have so many memories with these wonderful people...we got together with them every Christmas Eve, birthdays, Kristy and I would stay with them when Mom and Dad went on vacation.

I remember when their oldest (or is it eldest?) daughter Stacy was married, Kristy was told that she could try on Stacy's dress when she turned 8. On The Day (that my sister looked forward to for a looooooooong time) they took some lovely pictures of Kristy all dressed up. It was such a special thing for them to do.

A famous story in our house was about the attitude Kristy and I took when our parents explained to us that we had godparents and what they were for. Mom and Dad were heading for a trip to England and told us that if something happened to them, we would go live with Ted and Susan. Our kind and very deep feeling parents were prepared for emotional outbursts or some other psychological reaction but instead they received maturity and understanding from their daughters. It was later that day that Mom caught Kristy and I walking around the house with a marker and masking tape, labeling everything we wanted to get when our parents died. Not quite the reaction the parenting books warned the folks about.

In October 1987, I experienced my first earthquake. It was the morning, my mom had walked out the door to go to work, my dad and sister were in the back of the house getting ready for the day and I was on my way out the door to get my brush from the car before my mom left. The earthquake hit as soon as I opened the door. My mom yells to me to get under the dining room table. On my way, a fake-no, that sounds bad, let's say faux-grandfather clock barely misses me on its way to the ground. The noises I heard scared me to the core. The aftershocks kept coming and coming and I stayed under the table.

When the quake stopped, an eternity of silence began. My 10 year old dramatic mind was sure that the earth had obviously opened up and swallowed my family whole. My mind raced with so many thoughts and questions but at the forefront: How far is the city of Cerritos and do I really know how to go to Ted and Susan's?

My mom says it was maybe 1 full minute between the quake and my mom coming back inside the house. By then, I had picked out my room (duh, Kelli's was way better than Stacy's!) and I wasn't all that sad about my family being gone because Ted and Susan always had Kudos Bars and I kept thinking about how they might give me one when I got over to their house.


I mean, c'mon. Those Kudos bars are really good.


Sue was a delightful woman to be with. Her speaking voice was almost melodic and her laughter was infectiously contagious. She taught me how to take baths "Armstrong Style" which meant candles, music, a good book and no one knocking on the door. Sadly, Sue is no longer with us and, as many of you know, I will be walking the November Breast Cancer 3-Day walk in her honor. I scanned the photo I posted above to put on my personal fundraising page and as I looked at it, I felt it was perfect for a Flashback Friday Post.

I Hope This Friendship Lasts Forever

My Cup Runneth Over

Luke 2:19
But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.

I was sitting in my quiet living room a few minutes ago. I was replaying each minute of the last 2 hours in my mind. I found myself going over and over a couple of them. As if rewinding my mental DVR (I have upgraded my internal player from video tape.)

I see the smiles, I hear the beautiful singing. I see the hands in the air. Those hands. I have kissed each one of those fingers.

As I sat, I thought: What am I doing? I don't remember the last time I was so overwhelmed with love for someone as to sit still and reflect on something so repeatedly. That is when the verse in Luke came to me. I was treasuring all the things and pondering them in my heart. In only the way a mother can. I felt each snuggle I had just received through the very pores of my body. I remembered each movement of those sweet lips as if they were my own movements.

We had closing ceremonies for Nathan's first ever participation in Vacation Bible School. He went with his cousin Jayden to his church for the last 3 days this week. It was exciting and scary and slightly shocking that I could drop my sweet boy off (who looked really reeally tiny in that big room of even bigger kids) and come back a few hours later and he would have had snack, made a craft, sang songs and learned more about the Jesus he hears of at home. I loved the time with Lucy Joy but I missed my boy. And no amount of creative questioning could retrieve the information I so desperately wanted: What did you DO today, Nathan?

I was told one day that Nathan didn't miss me because he had Jayden. But Iam missed me. That was nice to hear because I missed Iam.

Nathan had an iron on transfer we needed to put on a white t-shirt for tonight. I did it because I love doing iron ons and I thought maybe, just maybe Nathan would want to go to the church. We loaded up in the car, armed with video camera, and headed off for this cute and adorable "baby" church that had taken such good care of my boy this week.

He sat with his team.
He was handed a hat.
He put the hat ON.

And then, the music started. Pirate Ben called the song leaders to the stage and Nathan walked up. He nestled himself into a comfortable place on stage (where he was NOT supposed to be) and faced the crowd with a smile and he did the hand motions. He sang the song.

Mommy started crying.

He received a goodie bag, certificate and picture of his team. We picked up a really cute craft that is now hanging proudly in my home. Grandparents were called and recounted the story of the night.

And now, a few hours later, I sit in my living room chuckling to myself how ordinary this story is. How all over America, mothers like me are proud of their children, for even more exciting things than simply completing 3 days of VBS (or "PDS" if you ask Nathan.) I can honestly say I don't care how simple and mushy to some this moment may be. For tonight I am filled with more love than I have ever felt for my son. It is a love that is part hope, part delight, part enrapturement into this world he entered for a few days and the rest is the satisfaction of seeing his true and rightful Nate the Greatliness.

Clean.

Dear Madam,

I wanted to write you to express my delight upon visiting S&S Edwards House of Showers Sunday night. I was greeted promptly at the door by a lovely young lady and a very sweet four legged beast who I can only assume is the mascot of your establishment. He was kind enough to allow me to scratch him behind the ears.

There was very little chit chat and after being directed where to go, I was able to take a very enjoyable shower in veritable peace. (This is a pleasure I do not often receive!)

Upon entering the beautiful, clean shower-free of standing water and soap scum as I have been experiencing in my own home-I unpacked all my personal products and began to shower. When it came time to wash, I passed over my own product and opted for the delicious and fragrant shower gel placed in there for the use of your guests. When I was done, I smelled like cinnamon buns (and, I daresay, I was a little hungry.)

The whole experience was a delightful one and I was pleased with the excellent service I received. Your House of Showers came highly recommended to me by a dear friend-I believe you know her-and I was not disappointed. Upon my leaving, I was wished a lovely evening and encouraged to return should my own personal shower continue to be out of service. I can promise you, that will happen again.

I found it interesting that even though I had never used your premises for this explicit purpose, I left with the distinct feeling of comfort, peace, and, if I may, friendship. Although a shower is a simple thing, it can clean more than a body, it often also cleans a spirit and renews it.

Most Warmly,
Bethany J. Zabrosky.

No, I'm Not Thirsty. I am a 21-Century Modern Woman and I Am Completely Hydrated

You always hear the negative news stories these days about how Americans are so unhealthy-we are overweight, sun burnt, and addicted to carne asada fries from Cotijas (or is that just me?)

But look around you, what do you see? People walking around carrying drinks everywhere they go. Water in bottles, Starbucks, sodas. We are a society focused on the transportationability (OK, that is a rockin' word I just made up!) of our beverages.

It is because of this phenomenon that I charge the news people to accentuate the positive and talk about how, as a society, we may be fat and addicted to junk food but we are the most HYDRATED society thus far!

It's a Nice Day to Start Again

It is 7:15pm and both kids are in bed.
The Hubby and I should totally be making out on the couch right now but we are so exhausted from our weekend we can barely play footsie.

Weddings are so much fun and we both were involved in a great one this weekend. My dear friend from high school drama class, Sara Jones, got married. I sang and David was the videographer (assisted by second unit Dodo Cook). This was not your normal affair in that the bridesmaids walked down the aisle to Billy Idol's "White Wedding" and the bride walked down the aisle to a Beatles song. But it also was clearly a wedding of two people who really did want to marry each other. They were relaxed, both stunned that this was actually happening and happy to cling to each other for strength.

The reception was a total party and we were seated with another high school drama friend and her husband who live near us. (Give it up for Pow-Way!) It is funny, we seem to have the most fun at wedding receptions where we hardly know anyone. Maybe we just enjoy the company of strangers?? Regardless, we walked away with some fun memories and new Powaegian Best Friends and Lovers of the Great BBQ. I can't wait to hang out with them.

Super Shusher Now Recruiting Team Members

Follow this link. To this I say, Amen.


**Bookmark this blog from the writer and creator of "Hoodwinked" one of the more hilarious animated films on DVD. I highly reccommend it-both the blog and the great movie.

I Have a Friend.

I have a friend who loves me the way I am but who also longs to see me grow as a Woman of God. She has taught me to take more pictures, capture moments and dream big.

I have a friend who knew me inside and out the instant she met me. She can calm me with simply a touch. Her sharp wit brings laughter to my life and sharpens mine as well.

I have a friend who knows everything. Every step, moment, mistake and victory of my past. She has been my rock through my toughest times and been present to experience the best of them as well. I know she will always be there no matter what.

I have a friend who compliments me. She is my better half and we understand so much of each other. I haven’t fallen into step with someone so quickly and each day we become closer-even if she makes all the phone calls.

I have a friend-she is my newest friend and I can tell we are kindred spirits already. I look forward to knowing her better each day.

I have a friend who is my bosom friend. She shares my passions for literature, drama, family and a good dare. The hurt we have walked through has drawn us closer and the healing we share moves us forward. She is the light of my life.

I have a friend who teaches me generosity in a way I have never experienced. She makes amazing cookies and is ready to share her wisdom whenever I may call. She loves my kids and frankly her sweet dog is the best dog of all the dogs.

I have a friend who makes me laugh. And laugh and laugh and laugh. Her personal journey towards self improvement and spiritual growth encourages me to follow that path.

I have a friend who has known me every day of her life. I have only lived 388 days without her but even that was too many. Simply put, I do not breathe without her. I wouldn’t want to try. I will love her forever.



May you be as blessed as I.

Flashback Fridays! Volume 1, Episode 1

The way the story goes, we had just gotten home from church and Mom let Dad take us and our new (and cute) matching dresses so he could take pictures of us in our plastic pool. We lived in Redlands, CA. a the time and I can confirm that it is pretty rotten weather there in the summer so I am surprised we didn't have more people in there with us!



I stumbled across these looking for some funny looking old pictures to blackmail one of my cousins with and I had to stop and smile. I love any pictures that include my sister (on the left) and me doing something together. Especially since we would give almost anything to be doing something together at any given moment of the day.



What absolutely made me stop in my tracks was the last picture. It was as if I had seen the faces before. you see, on the left I see Lucy and on the right I see Nathan!

*Concept stolen from blog friends Susie and Angela-thank you girls!*

But Are You Sweating Like the Smart Alec You Are?

Him: Hi Sweetie, Good Morning. How are you doing today?
Me: I am pretty good. Sweating like a pig though and I can't figure out why, it is only 76 degrees in here.
Him: You know, according to the little plaque at the zoo, pigs don't actually sweat.





Me: Pardon me, I am sweating unlike a pig. I am sweating QUITE UNLIKE a pig.
Him: That's better.

Give and Take

8:15pm, Wednesday Night
Mommy: Nathan, today you are getting...a NEW BED!
Nathan: Will it go inside my race car bed, Mommy?
Mommy: (gulp) No, your race car bed is going bye bye.
Nathan: Mommy, I think I like my new bed.
Mommy: *Serious sigh of relief*

10 minutes pass

Nathan: Mommy, I don't think I like my new bed. I like my race car bed.
Mommy: *uh oh!* But Nathan, there is a little boy who is too small for his crib that needs your race car bed. (You know, all those poor starving children in Africa who need race car beds??)
Nathan: There is?
Mommy: Yes, do you remember when you got your race car bed? What kind of face did you make?
Nathan: This kind!



Mommy: Do you think that little boy who gets your race car bed will have that kind of face?
Nathan: No, Mommy he will have this kind. *giggles*



5:55am, Thursday Morning
Nathan: Daddy, I think that boy will like my race car bed.
Daddy: That's so great Nate, now will you please go away?

The Summertime Boredom

This morning I tried to burn down my kitchen.



I wonder if Pampered Chef will replace that cutting board?

My Life is an Epilogue-Revisited

I will be submitting my writing in a contest that my friend Kristen encouraged me to enter. Many of you have read this in the past but it has been reworked into a first person story rather than a sermon-y e-mail. I don't think I will win but it was nice to work on a project (with the best editor in the world, Liz Norling). Keep your fingers crossed!!

My Life is an Epilogue

I drew myself a bath…my first in a long while. As the mother of 2 active children (1 and 3), on staff at our church and wife to a busy but wonderful husband, I needed my “old standard” of sloughing off my day into the bubbles of my tub. I grabbed the book I’d been reading. I had read another book by this author and was giving a new one a try. It was a touching story, deep, painful, vulgar at times and funny at others. I was committed to finishing it.

The water hadn’t even started cooling when I read it. A passage of the book had, for some reason, tapped deep into my heart and sprouted a flood of emotions and thoughts. The main character, T.S. Garp had lost a son in a freak accident for which Garp was partially to blame. A melancholy writer, Garp was reflecting on the loss that had torn his family-and marriage-to the breaking point. As the storyteller, he reflects:

"Ever since Walt died, my life has felt like an epilogue."
T.S. Garp "The World According to Garp"

I immediately got out of the bathtub-no longer relaxed-but my mind was buzzing with a million thoughts that I had to get out. I changed into pajamas and quietly snuck into my daughter’s room that also happened to be our office. I started writing an e-mail, reflecting on the quote, unsure of why it had sparked such an interest in me (especially when the story was getting really good!)

The epilogue of a book is an afterthought; sometimes a wrap-up of the story but most often the end. As if everything in the epilogue only relates to the story and nothing else that happens following the main story is worthy of additional chapters, sequels or revisits. T. S. Garp looked at the life he had in front of him and saw nothing that could provide any hope, only afterthoughts that would always remind him of his son, Walt.

My thoughts returned to my losses in life, more specifically, a journey in which God tested me, allowed me to break and brought me to my knees. It began in 1998. My father and mother asked my husband and me to come over to their house. We brought pie. Instead of dessert, we received news that tore my family apart. That night was the beginning of the end of my parents’ marriage and a complete destruction of a family unit I had used as a model for my own young marriage. When leaving my old house of memories, I collapsed on the front lawn-unable to stand under the weight of the terrible news. The death of my beloved uncle followed only a few years later. The loss to our family rocked an already fragile frame to the core. Following that, my husband’s parents announced an odd separation that we still don’t understand to this day. And then, our decision to stay and help rebuild the church we loved so much, while in the wake of destruction my own father helped cause, became a process more painful than expected.

We all have moments in life that change us. It could be a bad hair style on the wrong day to something like a family member dying. I took Garp’s phrase and inserted my own events:

"Ever since my parent's split, my life has felt like an epilogue."
B. J. Zabrosky, October 1998

OR

"Ever since Uncle Jim died, my life has felt like an epilogue."
Bethany J. Zabrosky, Every March 3 of Every Year to Follow From Now Until Forever.

I continued writing, wondering if I had done this very thing, reflecting to see if I had, indeed, allowed these events to “epilogue” my life. Upon my parent’s very public crisis and eventual split, I found myself not dealing with the hurt and pain and instead putting on a “survivor face” for the people at church. I loved hearing how brave I was and how inspiring it was for all the other people hurt in this to see me still attending the church. At home, I wasn’t taking care of myself. Regular every day actions like combing my hair, getting dressed or showering weren’t taking place. I turned to comfort foods as a band- aid to my wound. In 1999, I hit bottom and my friends around me encouraged me to get help. My husband helped me find a counselor and was there every step while the grace of God helped me find my way out of the darkness I had been living in. My uncle’s death was painful but I was able to rejoice with my family that he was in a Happier Place where the cancer had left his body, where he was free to move and delight in the presence of our Savior. And the rebuilding of our church was becoming easier and easier every day.

I started crying as I realized this. Picture this 29 year old, in her bathrobe, sobbing silently while her family slept and little baby made sweet moaning sounds in the crib next to me. And then see me on my knees. Thanking God for His presence through the last 8 years.

Suddenly, faces popped into my head. Names, people I know and love. Family members, friends who have had terrible things take their lives and wrench them into ugliness and pain. I was writing for them. God needed me to share this with them. I scanned over my e-mail-everything that had come into my head- and edited it for spelling only. I hit send before I thought twice. I knew that for some of the family I was sending it to, I might hurt them. I knew that there were people hanging onto pain because it was easier to “epilogue” their life than it was to continue writing it. However, the response I got from others was encouraging. My writing was shared in Bible Studies, changed the lives of my friends who read my blog and I was even presented with the opportunity to talk to a group of mothers at a church mom’s group.

You, who are currently reading this and following this train of thought, may I encourage you to participate in this exercise as I did my friends and family that night? Take your life-changing event; the one that pops up in your mind each day and is stopping you from moving on with your life. Bring to mind that life-changing moment that grips you with such fear that even your strongest of wills finds itself immovable and fill-in the blank:

"Ever since ______________________, my life has felt like an epilogue."
You, Today and Right Now.

Face it! Accept it! Look at it and stare at it. If you think you have a moment in your life that you can put in that blank, then you need to realize it right now. Your life HAS become an epilogue as mine did once. A moment of time has taken away all your future moments and captured your permanent attention. That's it. You are done. You will forever view life through that experience, that time of anguish. Say it out loud if you need to. It hurts. Let it hurt and allow it to leave your body with each exhale you take.

Can I invite you to take another deep breath? Because I feel I might have some hope for you.

I have a Friend. A God who Reigns my Life. Who is Knower of All Things Good and Bad. And, what's more important, who is Knower of All Things Good and Bad IN MY LIFE. He has been called the Great Author, for it is He who writes our beginnings and our ends and...our epilogues.

Who can complete the Book of Anguish that you have allowed your life to become? My God.

Who has a fresh page, a brand new chapter for you to begin a whole new beginning? My God.

Who loves you so much that He is begging you to ask Him to help you? My God.

God wants us to take our Moments, our Disasters, our Life-Changing-Epilogue-Creating Times and hand them to Him. In Him we can find the strength, the courage to remove ourselves from the book of our lives that we are currently writing and start a new book. A book of Hope for the Future, one with greater strength than before.

Despite all of my circumstances, 8 years later, I feel I have avoided the epilogue lifestyle. Instead I have picked up, moved on, and started a new chapter with my church. Started a new BOOK by having my sweet children, Nate the Great and Lucy Joy and even had to learn a new language as relationships rebuild from divorce. Looking back, I see God holding the pen and writing His presence into my book of life.

I started the e-mail that night as a way of commenting that I didn’t WANT to be like T.S. Garp and look at my life as an epilogue. I didn’t have to look far beyond myself to find those who accomplished that. While my parents are no longer married, they have both applied their knowledge of God’s grace to their lives. They have allowed His healing to restore them to people who do not live in the shadows of their past or past actions. And while I lost an uncle in 2001, my aunt was the one who lost a husband. One who was the rock of his family and while she mourns his loss and acknowledges his absence from her everyday life, she met and married an amazing guy. One who was NOT my uncle but who LOVES her and together they are conquering the world airport by airport on all their adventures. THAT is a fine example of ending an epilogue.

The great thing is that no one needs to do it alone. The book of my life is filled with characters who have come alongside me, given me hope and shown me how to write again. You can do it too.

"Ever since ____________, my life has felt like an epilogue."