The One Where I Wish Change Never Happened

It's so odd the patterns of life. I planned to sit down tonight and blog about my severe upset and actual rage-that's right, I said rage-at Price Club (don't correct me) for changing the type of tortillas they sell.

For years I have been blissfully feeling myself, my family and specifically Carol and Kristy the sweet and wonderful taste of Porkyland tortillas. They were practically a religion in our household and now that they are gone, I think I am changing my religion to the "Filling the Price Club Comment Box With Complaints About The New Stupid Rubio’s Tortillas Until They Wise Up and Bring Back Porkyland" religion. Join me will you? We have weekly services at our local Price Club and the only tithe we require is you filling out a complaint kindly asking them what happened to their buyer's taste buds that he or she would feel the need to torture the innocent burrito or quesadilla lover with the filth now packaged as tortillas. Contact me if you want to convert.

But tonight I received a phone call about a friend of mine whom I have worked with for many years retiring from her position. She and I have been through hell and high water, literally. She has taught me the meaning of being an effective leader in a church, she has been the perfect example of grace under pressure and no matter what the problem, I have always been able to come to her for wisdom and advice. She has seen me get married, go through two amazing pregnancies and has loved my children as if they were her own grandbabies. She has held me when I was falling apart through the most painful time of my life and she has helped me heal and move on through those times.

She isn't going anywhere. She is simply retiring but as I sit alone on my couch wallowing in my self pity, I realize that I don't plan on stopping by the office as often as I already do. I don't want to go in there and not see her. I don't want to not see my babies' pictures on their computer monitor; I don't want to collaborate on a project without her. It isn't that I don't like the person replacing her, in fact, I love the person replacing her but my friend is the reason I visit. I miss working with her on a daily basis and I miss sharing my life with her. I don't know when I will get to do that now.

I hate change. I like things to be the same always. This is change and I hate it.

Tomorrow they will be announcing all of this in church and I don't want to go. I know that by the morning I will feel better. By tomorrow I will be able to see my friend free up her time to travel with her wonderful husband, visit her family more and simply relax from the pressure of literally keeping a church running even when we were leaderless for a few years. I will hug her and hold her and smile for her. But tonight I will be sad for myself...I wish I had a good tortilla.