Indiana Scones or Yes, You May Play With Your Food

It has now become part of our Thanksgiving Day tradition to enter "The Pic of the Plate Contest" a friend puts on every year. This year, there were 3 catagories: Most Traditional (the classic plate of food with table decorations,) Most Pathetic (saddest Thanksgiving Plate plus-usually-accompanying story,) and Most Creative (the plate that's the most crea---well, you get it.)

We won the first year we entered: May the Yams Be With You

The second year we entered, it was a sorry effort but better than not showing up at all: Luke, I am Your Tater

This third year, we discussed theme heavily. Do we stick with Star Wars or do we go a different direction? Eventually, we landed on Indy. We collected toys and trucked them off to my Mom's house. We had kind of planned on doing the scene from Raiders when the ark of the covenant was opened because we had Lego Nazi soldiers we could decapitate and when you are messing with food like cranberry sauce, bloody situations are very possible to achieve. Nathan also suggested the scene from Last Crusade when Indy has to choose the cup of Christ and he was told to "...choose wisely." And then, of course, we all threw around the big boulder scene that Indy is so well known for.

We came, we devoured, we digested. It was time to start building but I was finding that I wasn't really "feeling it" this year. You see, about 3 months ago, my very pregnant sister moved to New Mexico. Since moving she has become less pregnant and produced one of the most wonderful babies I have ever laid eyes on. And she was supposed to be in town (along with said wonderful nephew and previously blogged about husband) for Thanksgiving. But things change. And she was not there. She was part of the original build team the first year we entered and then last year, creating by myself was kind of lonely. And this year I was just feeling sorry for my Kristy-less self.

BUT, I couldn't let the sadness win! I stood up from the couch and headed into the kitchen to assess the leftovers. After explaining myself to a few onlookers, I quickly found a very ready step sister willing to jump in and help out! She claimed to not be very creative but said that she was very good at solving problems. My problem? What scene do we choose?

Here's your answer.....

Description Provided: Indiana Jones flees with the idol while attempting to out run a boulder made of Rice Krispy treats covered in cranberry sauce and yams. The cave surrounding him is constructed of baked potatoes, broccoli, spaghetti (yes, spaghetti was on our Thanksgiving plate this year,) and turkey. As he runs on a floor of apple strudel and corn, the walls of mashed potatoes, carrots, green beans and stuffing attempt to swallow him whole.

But we all know how this ends: Indy, for the win with stubble on his chin, whip in his hand and fedora firmly atop his head.

We had so much fun and I found that playing with my food with my step sister was turning out to be as much fun as playing with my sister Kristy! I suddenly found myself thankful for a silly contest and a chance to do something with someone different. When I left my Mom's that night, I hugged my step sister and thanked her. I told her that she "helped me miss Kristy a little less."

Here is a little more footage of the shoot.....


We didn't win this year. We were a little bummed till we saw the winner....it was awesome and creepy at the same time and it kind of blew the "Most Creative" category wide open.

We are already plotting for next year.................

The Follow Up....

I needed to resolve the looming question surrounding the Halloween Costume Decision wherein my very own child seemed to question the cool factor of one Han Solo.

The good news is that he was convinced to give the costume a go. It was easy to shop for and involved buying him clothes that he can totally wear in the Non Han Solo part of his life. His vest was just cut from a tee shirt that was 2 sizes too big. It was perfect. For his blaster, we already had a gun that we didn't even have to paint black and his "utility belt" was an over sized belt with various boxes of different shapes and sizes taped over with black duct tape. I wish I had grabbed some better photos of his costume but the day just didn't allow it.

Confession: My heart actually swooned a little when I would look at my cutie pie Han Solo.



Lucy was "Trixie the Halloween Fairy" and was also fairly easy to assemble. We took an XXL Men's tee and cut it up into a dress. My neighbor came over and helped me cinch it in the back to fit in the waist and we tied leftover pieces of Nate's tee we'd used for his vest to belt it all up. We didn't have tights to match the tee so we went with black and grey knee highs and orange wings from the 99 Cent store. The hair...how crazy is the hair?! We wanted a short brown wig and found it ironic to be covering up the hairstyle people are looking to find in a wig (super long, super blonde) with the hairstyle many people already have. We settled on a black wig based on price and the fact that it would make a more dramatic statement. I love how different she looked-it was awesome.

Ella was a simple butterfly. She was pleased and kept her wings on all night. Her one demand was that her hair have glitter. That was a simple accomodation although the glitter hair spray doesn't really contrast well to a head of bright blonde hair. But she was a happy girl who scored lots of candy and remembered her "thank yous" and tolerated actual people speaking words to her face. (She isn't the most social of children.)

And I cannot end this post without sharing MY costume! The pink wig was purchased last year and I just love it so much that I will probably always wear it at least once a year. But this year, I got to wear a tee that was too much fun to pass up. My friend found it online here. It was fun seeing people smile and see my shirt and then realize just what they were looking at. And for maximum effect, I wore a pair of pants that help me look super duper pregnant.



We ended our evening with the usual "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" but watched it in the front yard with our neighbors projecting it on their fence. It was part of their yard set up and they played it on repeat all night but started it all over just for their favorite Zablets.

Luke, I am Your Tater.

Last year was our first entry in a friend's Pic of the Plate Contest. It is, simply, a contest picking the best looking Thanksgiving Day Plate.

Last year we entered with this....

(You can see the whole story here: May the Yams Be With You.)

When I first posted the picture, we had not heard our result but we found out later that we WON! First place!

We looked forward to stepping up our game this year but after a long couple of days and eating out for Thanksgiving, we didn't think we had much of a chance to submit anything original. Additionally, last year's build team was scattered as near as Santee and as far as New Mexico. We had till 10pm to enter and we were half passed out on the couch with happily fed children fast asleep upstairs.

Around 9:40 I decided we owed it to ourselves to at least ENTER. I happened to have a small box of leftovers. After staring at the box for about 3 minutes, I came up with this....



I titled it, "Luke trains to become a Jedi Master on a bed of C-Level leftovers.....DAGOBAH!"

We didn't win, and I would have been unhappy if we did. We needed an original idea and there were some really creative entries this year. And one of the winners took a picture of her table that was completely stunning.

But I can sleep better knowing I represented.
And I think I will begin working on next year's theme....but what's better than Star Wars? hardly anything, really.

Because a Thankful Heart is a Happy Heart

It only seems fitting, right?

I could probably copy almost anyone's list and many of our things would appear to be the same...but I write this anyway. Because some days I am not feeling so thankful or not feeling very blessed or just feeling low and I need to be reminded that I have been blessed over and over again.

Family....I have the best. Parents who raised me with love and Jesus. A sister who has walked through the fire with me and won't ever let go of my hand. All of the people who are family through marriage.......adding them only completed the tribe and I am thankful for what each of them bring to my life.

My ZabFam....best husband ever. And you readers know it's true. 13+ years together and there will be a whole lot more. My Zablets are beautiful. They are so very funny and full of life and love. They drive me bonkers sometimes (and I think on purpose) but the crazy really is inevitable so might as well have fun with some short people while it's happening!

Friends....I have people in my life who have stepped up beyond what anyone could ever ask of someone else. And they STEPPED! They have made me laugh, they have watched my kids, they have fed my husband, they have cleaned my house, they have gone jean shopping with me. Seriously, jean shopping!

This year has had some incredible ups and the lowest lows I have ever experienced but my God has walked me through each step. He has been faithful. He loves me no matter what. He sent His Son to die on a cross for my sins. All the things I have done wrong and all the things I will do wrong just so I can be with Him forever! (And that's not something that's just for me! You too! Let's talk sometime.) I am thankful that along with that love came a church family and forever brothers and sisters.

I find myself thankful tonight for the things I get to do to express myself. I get to photograph beautiful families, sing weekly with some crazy talented people, work with some totally fun actors and even hop on stage every once in awhile. I have this place to write and sometimes even write things that have substance or just make people laugh.

Thanks, readers, for sticking it out through the times of plenty (NaBloPoMo) and and the lean (any other month that isn't November) and encouraging me to keep writing. We will have some fun together, you and me.

The Siren Call of Peanut Butter and Chocolate Make a Person Do Crazy things.

Today I have consumed more Resees Peanut Butter Cups than any person should consume in a 24 hour period....or even a 48 hour period.

Which brings me to my question: How much do you tax your kids' Halloween Candy Hauls?

Do you do a one time tax and just demand a handful (or three) of candy the night of the haul while the kill is still fresh and the flavors of Starburst and Milky Way have not mixed and tainted one another?

Do you tax on demand like a hungry tyrant whose blood sugar has dropped and the white blood cell to nougat ratio has reached dangerous levels?

Do you sit down to rational negotiations and demonstrate the give and take of living in a democracy?

OR

Are you of the Night Raid variety? Pillaging your child's bag of candy with abandon, knowing full well the rightful owner sleeps in a room far away from the carnage of Snicker Snacker Wrappers but still taking care to clean up each crumb of Butterfinger bar?

David and I live the blissful existence of children who forget just how MUCH candy they brought in by the day after Halloween so we happily live by the Pillage Method. Although I'd like to think it is more of a Robin Hood (with a nice muscle-y Russell Crowe) Method since we are robbing the Candy Rich to feed to the Candy Poor.

...Give Me Something Good to Eat!!

Did you know we had Halloween over a week ago?
And that the Zabs totally dressed up? AND Trick or Treated?

AND-this is the most important-we had NO major accidents or freakishly weird things happen! Hooray!

We did have some cute kiddos though.
Ella was an alien. She named herself "Baby Alien" and if she said it to you, the only word you would understand was "Baby." Trust me. I speak "Ella" and even I didn't know what she was saying for a long time. She loved her costume and I did too. I made it 4 years ago for Lucy when she was Ella's age.

Nathan decided he wanted to be a ninja. I don't know where he got the idea but we got him a black "UnderArmour" shirt and black sweats with a tight black hood from my mom that she wears when she's riding the Harley with Tim. The plan was for him to wear his black Jedi Cloak and while I know it isn't very "ninja-y" he needed more than he had. But the cloak was nowhere to be found! I did find a black sheet I use for photo shoots...but no matter how I draped it, he looked more like a terrorist than a ninja. After a few more tries, we figured out a way to drape the sheet without disturbing our neighbors. A black scarf around his waist held his sword perfectly.

Lucy declared she wanted to be a butterfly early on in the year. But as we got closer to the big day, she specified a MONARCH butterfly. A friend of ours is a lover of all things bug and his passion has sprouted this serious interest in my kids so I really shouldn't be so surprised.

After wandering the aisles of Jo-Ann's Fabrics, I came up with the idea of using their monster material (think the tattered clothes of Frankenstein) and bright orange fabric to sew together as wings. Thankfully, my mother is a sewing champion and she easily rigged together the wings and attached them to Lucy's arms. (Thank you Mom!!) We paired her black shirt with black shorts and orange and black striped tights just for fun. Unfortunately many people thought she was a witch so while we were raiding our neighbors' homes for candy, we also talked about how to inform people she was a monarch butterfly while remaining respectful.

Here's the digital proof of our night of plunder.....

The Obligatory Shot on the Stairs

The Cutest Alien!

(That's glitter on her face....but it photographed more like dirt.)

The Terrifying Ninja

And the 2 Sides of the Monarch Butterfly

(also with glitter on her face--my children were clean on Halloween, I promise!)

We ended up threading the criss cross straps under her shirt for a cleaner look...

After Trick or Treating, we continued our tradition of coming home and watching "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown" while eating 2 pieces of candy. This year we weren't out as long as usual so we had trick or treaters coming to our door and the kids LOVED handing the candy out--and I give goood candy. This year in our overflowing paper bags, we had Pixi Stix instead of Smarties which was fun but I missed having Smarties around.

Then there was general cuteness that needed to be captured....

May the Yams Be With You

Okay, so I have been saving this post since Thanksgiving, you guys. Because I was waiting for the results of the contest that my family entered. But, sadly, the contest results were never decided so I have no "Yay, we won!" or "Boo, we lost" ending for you.

But that doesn't mean that this challenge wasn't possibly one of the most exciting and awesome things I have ever done.
You are so excited, aren't you?

Okay, the contest was created by someone who loves Thanksgiving. And this was the second year of his "Pic of the Plate" contest where competitors took pictures of their Thanksgiving Dinner plates to submit for review. Simple, right?

Well folks, if you know anything about me, you know that I can't just enter a simple contest like this without putting some thought into it, um, a LOT of thought into it. I will be calculating how to win, how to be creative and how to get "in" with the judges so things will go my way. It isn't cheating-I am absolutely NO cheat. It is playing the game.

I knew a simple picture of the plate wouldn't be enough. I knew something better needed to be staged and it was so obvious that the quickest way to the Judge's heart would be through a common love: Star Wars.

We grabbed all of the Galactic Heroes we could find and looked to see who was there to create a scene around. There was Luke with Yoda on his back while he's training to become a Jedi. But that only involved using one figure. We had Jabba, Jedi Master Luke and Carbonite Han but no Princess Leia in the gold bikini (which I am actually okay with.) After calling in a Star Wars Ringer (aka my sister's boyfriend whose very knowledge and respect of all things Star Wars causes me to approve him as a good match for my sis) we decided to re-create the scene where Jabba is throwing Han, Luke and Lando to the sarlaac in the Pit of Carkoon. And the thing that decided it for us was the fact that we had cooked halved oranges with our turkey.

So, here was the setup....
It involved lighting, a black backdrop, the tripod and camera. We wanted to submit only a picture of the best quality as well.








And here was our final result:

(Notice R2D2 and C3PO upside down in the sand? That was Kristy's good memory on that one.)

So there you have it. And, like I said, sadly we never got a result but my family is thinking we just might have to make this a yearly event for us. We had so much fun working on our plate (using only food we had cooked or consumed for Thanksgiving dinner) that we think next Thanksgiving just might be boring without it! In fact, we couldn't take the plate apart till the evening of the next day. We left it out on the counter just looking at it when we walked by, so proud of our creation.

If this link works, you can see the original Facebook photo here.

Merry Christmas and Happy 2010

The Halloween of October's Past

I dug some of these out to show the kids and decided that I needed to embarrass myself even MORE on the internet (but this time, I am taking a couple of you down with me!)


Bethy the Fairy....sporting awesome purple velcro sneakers.


Political Correctness hadn't set in yet so it was okay to dress up like a bum with a Tootsie Roll as your cigar.


Everything that is wrong with this picture include the following:
1. I did it because I was scared of mimes.
2. Greet the mane of Julia Roberts Mystic Pizza Hair that would be permed in only 2 months.
3. The cast. It's purple. Broken ankle. PURPLE.
4. Black Keds. (Wait, I still kinda like those.)


I wish this picture showed the awesome jeans! They were real bell bottoms my mom found and we painted them all up with peace signs and daisies. I remember kind of wishing I could wear them all the time.


I was a pregnant Mama and these were my babies: my sister, my step sister and my sister's best friend. (Told ya I was dragging some of you along with me!)

Finally, this one wasn't from Halloween but I had to throw it in there because it includes the use of one of the most awesome wigs of ALL TIME.



I was on staff with our Jr. High Group and we were having a staff hunt at Seaport Village. The staff and other prominent people in the church dress up in ways the kids won't recognize us and then the kids have to come up to people they think might be a part of the staff hunt, they have to say some sort of ridiculous spy like phrase int he hopes that they will answer you with some sort of spy like phrase and then they get a clue to solve a puzzle after they have found everyone. It was one of my favorite events while on staff.

But after getting dressed up, we discovered it was raining and wasn't going to be letting up so we changed to North County Fair Mall and this wasn't quite as blend-in-able. So I changed.


But I still TOTALLY rocked the black wig.
And my sister did too.

Haloooo NaBloPoMo!

I greet you with the sweetness and light of a blogger who plans to write every single day for the rest of the month. And this is my first post. Note the sweetness. Note the light. Note that most of it is organically manifested within and not a direct result of the Halloween Candy Sugar High I will have for the rest of the month.

Wow, Bethany, a whole month of Candy Sugar High? Why yes, dear reader, because after I'd bought a very modest amount of candy and then watched as neighbors actually filled ALL THREE of my kids Pumpkin buckets TO THE TOP with candy, and then had only 3 trick or treaters come to the door, I have MORE candy than when I actually began the Halloween Celebration!

Think I'm being dramatic? Think I might exaggerate a little? Think this blog already contains too many questions? Well, here is the loot......



You know, it's hard to really judge depth in a photograph. Can we measure?



Wow. Look at that.


I now have 4 gallon Ziploc bags filled with leftover Halloween Candy. Everyone who works with David should just watch out: He's bringing it to you Monday morning.


Of course, they should also know there will not be a single peanut butter cup in the bunch.

It Doesn't Matter How I Breathe

It is the night before Easter. Easter Eve?

My family is all asleep and I am up running around like a crazy woman packing for church and the after-church. Both require many specific items like hair bows, t-ball gear, change of clothes and back up food options for the picky eaters of the family.

I also had to close myself in my car for a bit to listen to my iPod. I am singing a great song for church tomorrow. It is beautiful, the lyrics are powerful and the direction of the song requires me to summon up all the air I can pull into my lungs for one really big long note. I have the rest of the song down. It's that one note that is threatening to keep me awake all night.

When I sing-especially for church-I really really want it to be perfect. The main reason for this is because when you have a well structured service, one brought together with elements that blend together perfectly with enough room for the Spirit to move but structured so that it shows its purpose, one really botched song can throw that off. So I work hard-especially on the solos.

But as I was singing and NOT holding that note like I should, I realized something:

Whether or not I can hold this note for the full 10 counts, JESUS STILL ROSE FROM THE DEAD. If I mess up tomorrow, if my asthma kicks in and I find that I am lucky to be able to sing even one quarter note: JESUS IS STILL ALIVE! If I get to church and breeze through rehearsal and forget the words during the service: JESUS DEFIED DEATH!

Tomorrow's service has been prayerfully assembled. Each seat in our Worship Center will hold a soul that God hopes to make a personal connection with on Sunday morning. I am His vessel for carrying that message no matter what my physical body can handle.

When I was first singing in church as a high schooler, I sang a song by Crystal Lewis. I had a new dress to wear, my hair was done the way I liked and when it was my turn in the service, I got up and sang. It was perfect. I got to the musical break where I had selected some scripture to be read while the track played in the background. I began to read, it was awesome! I got to one part and lost my place. It was like the words of the page just FELL OFF and were heading out the door to beat the Methodists to all the good lunch places! The scripture was telling about the miracle Jesus performed on the man who was lowered through the roof to get close to Jesus. As I read and tried to catch myself up, I remember I said, "the guy" instead of "the man." THE GUY? Why not "the dude" or "that one" or just grunting and squealing like a pig instead of saying "the guy?" I. was. mortified.

I finished the song, survived the rest of the service and I cried the whole way home. Later that week, I got a card in the mail from a dear friend's mom. She told me how much she loved my song on Sunday. How God touched her through the words I sang and thanked me for sharing. Look at that! God still can work powerfully in our lives even when our human-ness attempts to get in the way of the message!

I am thankful tonight that it wasn't my job to get Jesus out of the grave. Because if you know me, you know I sometimes flake out on things. I will forget, be late or show up on the wrong day. And if that had happened, well, our end would not be a happy one. Jesus didn't need us to raise Him. Yes, our sin put Him there. But it was by His choice. And it is because He is perfect that He rose again.

Tomorrow, Easter Sunday, when I prepare to sing, I am going to remember that God doesn't need my perfection to make the Easter Sunday at Vista Grande Community Church the Most Powerful Church Service of All Time Known To Man! He needs my obedience to sing the song I am meant to sing. He needs me to offer Him my "first fruits" and deliver the very best performance I humanly can. He needs me to reflect Him with my words and praise.

And that is something I will NOT be late for.

Holy holy holy
Is the Lord God Almighty
Who was and is and is to come.
With all creation I sing
Praise to the King of Kings!
You are my everything
And I will adore you.
-Revelation Song by Jennie Lee Riddle
sung by Kari Jobe (And me!)

Description: Fluffy, Sticky and Covered in Sugar

Dear Nathan, Nicholas, and Lucy,

You may notice this year that your Easter baskets are....um.....missing something this year. You have always had some form of Peeps in your Easter Baskets and, well, they just aren't there this year.

It's because a bird FLEW INTO THE HOUSE and opened the pantry and moved the spagetti sauce aside to open the tied bag of Easter candy and took ONLY the Peeps and then flew out! The whole time calling out, "Peeps! Peeps! Peeps!"

Wait...I have something better.

A pack of wild dogs came as me as soon as I opened the back of the car and they ripped open the bags from Target and TOOK ALL THE PEEPS! It was terrible and I barely escaped with my life.

Hang on-I've got more.

It was like a FORCE FIELD made all the mags magically float out of the shopping bags and into my mouth.
Dang it. I gave it away.

I'll make it up to you. Look for an abundance of Easter colored Whoppers. Just as good as Peeps. And they don't silently call out to the wildlife of San Diego to seek and consume.

A Collection of Orange Food...

It is Christmas Eve and time to lay out the spread for the Big Guy...


What you see pictured here is Egg Nog (Santa's favorite,) pumpkin pie and Cheetos. Yes, Cheetos. Lucy insisted. I stopped her short of putting the them IN the pie "like birthday Cheetos." We also have carrots for the reindeer and the biggest carrot saved in a special, separate bowl for Rudolph who is now Nathan's favorite reindeer as referenced in the letter pictured.



Let's take a closer look at that letter....


Whaaaat? This is news to ME! And when Mommy-I mean Santa-looks up wooden sleds online, (s)he finds they cost about $100 which is a little steep when we go to the snow for exactly 4 hours each year. Boy Santa is going to be bumming out one 5 year old this year. Geez, Santa.

Merry Christmas Nathan.


Merry Christmas, Lucy.

Merry Christmas to all of you from the Zablet Three!!

All About Math!

It's a very simple formula.
Take this....

and this...


And you will be declared to be the BEST MOM EVER!

I got small-ish Christmas Trees for the kids' rooms. The girls' tree is pink, of course. And the boys' got classic green with colored lights since they told me they like colored lights better than my beloved all white lights.

If I had only known the end result...we might have done this a whole lot sooner.
Like in July.


Bonus Image titled "Fun with F-Stop"

This is How We Do Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving at my mom's with my step sister and her adorable kids included a photo shoot of awesome proportions. Mom made flame outfits for the kids and Grandpa Tim put his blue flame shirt on-isn't that how everyone dresses for Thanksgiving Dinner?

Please to enjoy....

(L-R) Nathan, Lucy, Grandpa Tim, Ella, Cameron, Felicia and Bethany
Also pictured: Grandpa Tim's totally awesome Harley

Cameron and Lucy make good cousins....but he doesn't know what to do with her half the time. None of us do, really.

The boys have to stick together.

Felicia, Bethy and Ella

Grandpa Tim at the bottom of the grandkid dog pile!

Knock, Knock...You're on in 5, Christmas

The good news is that I didn't poison David's family.
The even better news is that I think everyone had a really nice time.

We are 3 for 3 in Thanksgivings this year and I am officially declaring the season closed.

Enjoy your leftovers. And don't let anyone steal your sandwich....with the Moist Maker.

Give Turkey the Bird

Today was Thanksgiving Number Two. (We have Three of them this year which is less than last year and since I am not nearly as pregnant or stressed, it is all 100% better.)

Today's Thanksgiving was the traditional, jeans and t-shirts and turkey and mashed potatoes and lots of loud kids in a small space kind of Thanksgiving. Last night was the refined, beautiful and lovely Thanksgiving at a gorgeous restaurant with only my kids acting like maniacs. And tomorrow holds the Why Isn't My House Clean Enough to Have Guests Over and Please Dear God Don't Let Me Ruin Both Turkeys or the Mashed Potatoes and Is It Bedtime Yet Thanksgiving. In other words, I am hosting. Pray for my in-laws.

When we haven't been eating or parenting or kind of cleaning, we have been enjoying this:



I love this show.

Holidays Make Us Do Weird Things...Happy Day of Thanks!

I hope your day was so amazing that it caused you to dress up like a pilgrim with your sister and childhood friend and then stand in the living room and take pictures.

The Candy Round Up

Well, we canvased the neighborhood and the facts are as follows...

-We hit more houses this year than ever before. Longer legs and the high fructose corn syrup siren's song seemed to motivate the walking despite the lack of naps.

-Storm Troopers do NOT wear tennis shoes. They prefer brown flip flops.

-The Baby Ruth is completely absent from the candy haul this year. I am severely disappointed.

-A black cat missing her headband ears is still cute with eyeliner drawn whiskers.

-When you are cute and have curly hair and are wearing an Alice in Wonderland costume, people will give you more candy than your Storm Trooper escort. Honest. I saw it happen at almost every house. (World, Lucy DOES NOT need more candy. I know she's cute. I know she has freckles abundant and that she smiles at you in a way that makes life worth living but if you keep giving her sugar, I will send her to live with YOU.)

-But somehow the Storm Trooper pulled in a full sized candy bar and Alice only had, well, twice as much candy.

-Following the lead of some lawmakers, the child with the most candy will be more heavily taxed than the one with the least.

Where's My Salt?

Happy Mother's Day!

I am winding down my day watching the Survivor Finale (shhh, I don't know who won yet!) and everyone in my house is upstairs asleep. Ahhhh...that brings me such bliss. This is where I decide if I want to stay up all night, watch TV and pay for it tomorrow or do I go to bed and get the rest I need? Hmmmmmm.

Mother's Day was a nice one-started things waking up around 7 and realizing that I had slept all night long! Ella didn't wake up once (or if she did, she didn't state her case loudly enough to wake me up) and I had my first full night's sleep in months. Thank you Ella.

I told David that he should be thankful we go to church because then he doesn't have to get the kids together to make things for me. Lucy brought me the sweetest bunch of pipe cleaner and construction paper flowers she had colored-it melted my heart. I think I will keep them forever.

Nathan brought me a snail.

Seriously, a snail.

And I'm not even talking about something he found in a nearby bush. His Sunday School teacher gave it to him. In a cup. He was so excited to show me-as it was trying to JUMP OUT OF THE CUP AND ATTACK ME! It was going for my throat-honestly. I informed him-Nathan, not the snail, I don't talk to snails-that if he did not keep the snail IN the cup I was going to KILL THE SNAIL. I am not kidding, I looked my 5 year old in the eyes and meant every word I said.

Thank you Mrs. Yvonne, Sunday School teacher. Thank you for sending a SNAIL home for Mother's Day. I asked Nathan WHY we now had a snail as a part of our family...why had Mrs. Yvonne given everyone snails? He was quiet for awhile and told me, "I guess she wanted all of us to have a pet!"

The snail's name is Carlsbad Alexander Zabrosky. And Carlsbad is pronounced "carls-BAD" because he is BAD for trying to get out of the cup. As of right now, he is residing in a water bottle. He is expected to make it through the night but most likely not the week.

Oh, and have I told you all how I hate snails?

Well, at least I didn't crush the thing. My future daughter-in-law Alexis gave her daddy her teeny tiny baby snail to hold along with some potted flowers Mrs. Yvonne had also given the kids. (I didn't see the flowers when Nathan handed them to me-all I could see was the snail.) Damon took the potted flower's cup and dropped it into the snail's cup. Needless to say, both the snail and Alexis were crushed. Nathan was incredibly upset on behalf of his friend (and future bride.) I tried to get him to give her his snail but apparently his love for her just doesn't go that far.

Darn it.