Friday, July 28, 2006

My Cup Runneth Over

Luke 2:19
But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.

I was sitting in my quiet living room a few minutes ago. I was replaying each minute of the last 2 hours in my mind. I found myself going over and over a couple of them. As if rewinding my mental DVR (I have upgraded my internal player from video tape.)

I see the smiles, I hear the beautiful singing. I see the hands in the air. Those hands. I have kissed each one of those fingers.

As I sat, I thought: What am I doing? I don't remember the last time I was so overwhelmed with love for someone as to sit still and reflect on something so repeatedly. That is when the verse in Luke came to me. I was treasuring all the things and pondering them in my heart. In only the way a mother can. I felt each snuggle I had just received through the very pores of my body. I remembered each movement of those sweet lips as if they were my own movements.

We had closing ceremonies for Nathan's first ever participation in Vacation Bible School. He went with his cousin Jayden to his church for the last 3 days this week. It was exciting and scary and slightly shocking that I could drop my sweet boy off (who looked really reeally tiny in that big room of even bigger kids) and come back a few hours later and he would have had snack, made a craft, sang songs and learned more about the Jesus he hears of at home. I loved the time with Lucy Joy but I missed my boy. And no amount of creative questioning could retrieve the information I so desperately wanted: What did you DO today, Nathan?

I was told one day that Nathan didn't miss me because he had Jayden. But Iam missed me. That was nice to hear because I missed Iam.

Nathan had an iron on transfer we needed to put on a white t-shirt for tonight. I did it because I love doing iron ons and I thought maybe, just maybe Nathan would want to go to the church. We loaded up in the car, armed with video camera, and headed off for this cute and adorable "baby" church that had taken such good care of my boy this week.

He sat with his team.
He was handed a hat.
He put the hat ON.

And then, the music started. Pirate Ben called the song leaders to the stage and Nathan walked up. He nestled himself into a comfortable place on stage (where he was NOT supposed to be) and faced the crowd with a smile and he did the hand motions. He sang the song.

Mommy started crying.

He received a goodie bag, certificate and picture of his team. We picked up a really cute craft that is now hanging proudly in my home. Grandparents were called and recounted the story of the night.

And now, a few hours later, I sit in my living room chuckling to myself how ordinary this story is. How all over America, mothers like me are proud of their children, for even more exciting things than simply completing 3 days of VBS (or "PDS" if you ask Nathan.) I can honestly say I don't care how simple and mushy to some this moment may be. For tonight I am filled with more love than I have ever felt for my son. It is a love that is part hope, part delight, part enrapturement into this world he entered for a few days and the rest is the satisfaction of seeing his true and rightful Nate the Greatliness.