Family

You need to read this: One Thing: Stupid is as Stupid Does
I wish I had written it.


When I look around my house I see piles of laundry higher than normal, kitchen floors that used to be white and dishes that need to be washed.

My InBox is loaded up with actual work that needs to be done, my photography site is highly neglected, my e-mail updates to my family far away have been too few and far between.

I think I may have worn the same shirt 3 days in a row, I need to comb my hair and someday I should get all the mail sorted and put away in the right place.

But then, I look in my lap. There is a ball of life smiling, cooing, streching, smacking her lips and grunting. Her fists thrash around in the air at me when she is angry and her toes curl when she is delighted. I spend almost all of my day looking at her. Holding her. Feeding her.

Let the toys go untidied, let the shoes reamin unpaired around the shoe basket, let the dinners be a steady diet of burritos and mac and cheese. Because I am holding an actual moment of time in my arms that I would not give up for anything. Besides, Nathan is here and he wants a peek, Lucy is on the arm of my chair sneaking a kiss and David is standing above me calling out the name of our family's newest obsession...

"Ella...Ella....Ella. We love you."

Ready, Set......

We open the fridge-there is no milk.
Where's the milk?
We need the milk!

It is 9:45pm on Sunday night and the race has begun:
Who can change into comfy clothes/pajammys first so THEY don't have to do the late night store run? (Last man standing fully dressed "gets" to go to the store.)

I will not be surprised to be lobbied with a change of rules in favor of a Rock-Paper-Scissors challenge upon David's return.

Needing a Dictionary

I have a new(ish) laptop and now when I play my favorite computer game, the finger-touch pad is calibrated differently and I am not getting the high scores I usually get.




I know, isn't my life a complete tragedy?

Be Clean and Be Green

Just because Earth Day is over, that doesn't give you the excuse to go out and be wasteful. So please allow me to offer you 1 simple Green Tip to carry you through the year....

Conserve Water: Shower With a Friend

It's fun and you never know what the outcome may be.....even 9 months later.

Hey Baby, You Stink

Seriously?
What are we....18th Century Europeans?!


The following is from New York Magazine...
Baby Cologne Sounds Like a Truly Appalling Product
In johnson & johnson



Sometimes babies smell. They wear diapers, they spit up, sh** happens (excuse the pun). But this is expected because they're babies. We'd guess there are few well-cared-for babies that smell so bad their moms and dads actually need to do something about it. We don't normally hang out with babies, but we can't say we've ever been in the presence of a child that smelled so bad we felt offended, and if we have, we doubt that child was in its infancy. After all, how bad can something so small smell? But Johnson & Johnson would like mothers to believe we're wrong and some babies smell offensively enough they need cologne, which is why they make Baby Cologne. Yes, really.


Here's the description that comes on the bottle:

Johnson’s Baby Cologne has a gentle, fresh fragrance with a pleasant combination of floral and citrus hints. It leaves your baby smelling clean and fresh. This clinically proven mild formula is alcohol free, making it just right for your baby's delicate skin.


According to Spoiled Pretty, it smells terrible. But isn't cologne meant to be smelled up close, which would mean that really only the people who are holding the baby would be able to smell it, which should be parents, with the rare exception? We don't know a lot about parenting or anything, but if parents think their baby smells so bad they need cologne, well, that just doesn't sound like a warm, nurturing relationship that leads to happy 12-year-olds. We wonder if things like this are why 8-year-olds go on diets these days.

Johnson's Baby Cologne [Spoiled Pretty]

Strike a Pose

My sweetie schmoopsie poopsie snugglekins is getting so very big. I do apologize for the silly baby talk but in all seriousness, she is sooooooooo cute. (Now that is some quality writing right there. Instead of making use of the English language, I will just keep adding "o's" to the end of the word "so." I am a literary genius.)

I staged a little photo shoot for our sweet Ella Bella the other day in hopes of getting something I could use for a baby announcement. (Coming soon! Before she turns 11, I promise!) I bribed Lucy to be my assistant with the promise of her own photo shoot afterwards and did everything I could to keep Nathan...just away.

Anyway, I am not sure if I will use them or not but I have been sitting on these for so long and I just can't keep them to myself any longer. Enjoy.

Do you have a favorite?

Where "Be Careful what You Pray For" is Clearly Illustrated

When Lucy first came to our family, we made sure that Nathan learned how to "be soft" with his new sister. We reminded him to have "soft touches" when he'd get close. This point was especially reinforced one day when I left the baby in the middle of the room on a blanket, ran upstairs and came back to find no baby. But Nathan was laying flat in the middle of the blanket--ON TOP OF HIS SISTER.

As Lucy grew, so did her will. And strength. An determination. We found that she didn't quite need the protection she needed only a few months before. In fact, we often turned out heads and let her throw a punch every now and then. But as time went on, it became clear that Lucy was fully capable of issuing a full sized smackdown of her own. It was Nathan who needed the protecting this time.

Now that Nathan is a full foot taller than Lucy, the tables are back where they were. He's a strong boy and has learned some moves while wrestling his friends. He's often reminded he's the biggest and strongest and needs to be more careful when he is playing. And when dealing with his sister, we have found that for every new move Nathan has learned, Lucy has learned the art of crying and how best to use her tears.

Last week, we had a bout a million errands to run before a park playdate. I hopped out of the car for a minute and returned to a sobbing Lucy and Nathan who was saying, "Sorrysorrysorrysorrysorry! I'm so sorry!" Hmmm. What happened? Lucy pulled Nathan's arm. So he pulled it back.

We drove to the park to meet our friends. Lucy was still complaining about her arm and when we got out of the car, she started sobbing about it. My friend-who knew a bit about hurt arms-suggested it was Nursemaid's Elbow and offered to set it back but Lucy was crying so hard, we decided we'd just keep an eye on it while I fed the baby before doing anything.

I watched Lucy Joy: Professional Playground Junkie walk around the park for an hour and not play on anything. She held her arm, she'd come over and snuggle me. She even attempted to eat raisins out of a box one handed while walking. It was possibly the saddest thing I had ever seen. And, more importantly, she was not using her arm at all. I called the doctor and got an appointment for about 2 hours later.

By the time I got to the doctor’s office, Lucy still wasn’t feeling well. When we got out of the car, she was still very sad.

When we got to the waiting room, I noticed she was holding her bag of goldfish with the bad arm.

And by the time we were in the examination room, she was SWINGING HER ARMS ABOVE HER HEAD and singing.



Sigh.

I think she possibly popped it back when she was getting out of the car when she had it in this weird position and it kind of got “caught” on the back of the front seat. Because even my own daughter isn't THAT good as an actress.

I was mad at first that I was sitting there in the doc’s office with a perfectly healthy (and quite obnoxious since she hadn’t had a nap) daughter. But then I remembered that on the way to the office, I had prayed that the visit would not be traumatic, painful or upsetting to her.





It definitely wasn’t.

giggle, giggle, giggle

We sit together at a romantic dinner for two. It is our anniversary-11 years of wedded bliss. Well, we have been wedded at least, it isn't all bliss. He looks up from his delicious plate of food and it begins....

"I have something to tell you about. Something you aren't going to like."

"What??"

"Well, this morning, Nate and I were hanging out before you girls were awake. We were sitting at the table and I had to toot so....


...I HAD HIM PULL MY FINGER."

The record scratch silence was heard from Little Italy all the way to Poway.

"I'm sorry, you did what?"

"I had him pull my finger and then I tooted. He thought it was the funniest thing he had ever heard and laughed for a full minute. Then he tried pulling it again but it didn't work that time. But he was still laughing."

*cricket, cricket*

"Sweetie? Say something."

"I will be giving all of Nathan's school friend's mothers YOUR PERSONAL CELL PHONE when those boys come home asking to pull their dad's fingers."


Fast Forward 5 Days
The scene: The back row of the car on the way to Disneyland

Nathan: "Hey Lexi............pull my finger."

"David!"!

Fingers Crossed That I am Psychic

While shopping for beds at a local furniture store...

"Mommy, look at this bed! I love it! We should get this one."

"No Nate, we aren't getting a bunk bed. I don't think we will ever get a bunk bed," I said as I imagined Lucy deciding to rappel from the top of the bunk bed out the window using only hair ribbons and strips of princess dresses.

"When I am a daddy, I will get one for my kids," came the firm and quiet reply.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, twin boys. There will be two of them in my wife Lexi's tummy and they will have a bunk bed."

I stopped walking, leaned in really close to the wide eyes of my son and replied:

"Nathan, I WISH twin boys upon you. I really really hope you have twin boys."



(Sorry Lexi, he deserves them.)

The Facts of Life are All About Yoooooouuuuuu

Nathan: Lucy, let's go see Lando! (The new "sucker fish we got last week-full name: Lando Calrissian Zabrosky)

Lucy: Nathan...I think Lando's dead.

Nathan: What?

Lucy: He's dead, see?

Nathan: No he's not. He's just lying on his side and being really still!