I Believe.

I am watching “The Polar Express” and crying. I cry over and over when I watch this movie. It is the second time in 2 days that we have seen it (I breed repeat movie watchers and I love it.) The most touching part is the very end when the young boy receives the bell from Santa’s sleigh after he thought he lost it. He opens his present Christmas Morning and seeing what it represents for him just tugs at my heart.

The idea of Santa Claus is controversial among many church-going people. Many feel that the idea of Santa detracts from the reason we have Christmas in the first place. And because they don’t want that distraction, they don’t do the “Santa Thing.” In my house we didn’t have Santa. I think David might have once or twice but his family didn’t go all out.

However, in our house, we do the “Santa Thing.” Cookies and egg nog (our Santa likes Egg Nog-not warm milk, yuck) and carrots for the reindeer. I love that Nathan has something magical to believe in, to dream about. As I think about our decision more and more each year, I think that Nathan’s grasp of something magical and slightly mysterious will only make it easier for his to grasp the true “magic” of the birth of Christ-another story of mystery and wonderment.

I want Nathan to not be ashamed to believe in the unbelievable. I want him to have no doubt in his heart that the things he treasures so deeply are true. Including Santa Claus, the magic of Disneyland, believing in something so hard and so much that it will come true, wishes on stars and coins in fountains. Because as he believes in those things and continuously hears from us of the great things that God does in his life and the lives of those around him, he will easily understand something that so many adults cannot even grasp: FAITH.

And it is working. Ask my son about his thumb, he will tell you that God touched it with his Healing Hand and made it better. Want to know what a scab is? It is God’s Band Aid. What is the meaning of a rainbow? It is God’s promise that He will always take care of us. And don’t try to tell my kid any different. For as sure as the sun rises, as sure as Steve finds all three clues, as sure as we have sandwiches for lunch every day-there is a God. And He loves Nathan. (And YOU too!)





Post Script
I realize that this post could be 15 times longer as I discuss the pros and cons of teaching my children about Santa Claus. I could also discuss the good and bad of a (slightly creepy) movie like Polar Express. However, and I give you the credit for being smart enough to realie this, this was not the purpose of this post. I respect those who choose to not teach of Santa as well as not watch Polar Express, I hope that you can respect my decisions as well.

The One Where His Silliness Knows No Bounds

I got Nathan's school pictures back the other day. He looked so amazing in them! I them from his teacher and as I see his angelic face peeking through the window of the envelope. I smile and say to him, "Nathan, you said you made a funny face in your picture. This is a smiley face!"


That is when his teacher says to me, "Oh he did make a funny face--for the CLASS picture! It was so funny!"


I open the envelope and there it is.


My kid.


With 12 others


Sticking his tongue out.

NaBloPoMo 2006 Final Post!

I want to finish the story of

Love at the Roller Rink

or

How I Met Your Father

or

Just Me and DZ

but I am exhausted. I am using the last day of NaBloPoMo to take a "bi" since I posted real posts every day.
Well, almost.

So, what have we learned this month??

-I still love to write.

-I am bad luck on Halloween

-When I am called to step up, I will walk every mile!!

And finally....

-I will miss the NaBloPoMo Randomizer!!! Man, that thing was like crack and is the direct result of my November Exhaustion!

Dear Readers, I ask only one more thing of you. If just for today, just comment a hello. I would love to know who is reading, lurking and-hopefully-enjoying this journey I am on. Say hi and I promise I won't make you do it again!

Till tomorrow..........................

It's Got Four Wheels and a Stopper on the Toe

I was only a child when my best friend Michelle got married. 17 and a bridesmaid for the first time. As the big day neared, Michelle and her Looks-A-Lot-Like-Tom-Cruise fiancee decided that both sides of the wedding party needed to meet. So we took a spin.

Around the roller rink!
Monday nights we all made a regular habit of crashing the Aquarius Roll-a-rena for Christian Skate Night. We grooved the lanes to dc talk, Petra and did the chicken dance once a week.

When I was introduced to the guys on Andy's side of the aisle, they all were good looking. A couple of brothers and friends. One in particular I was told to pay extra attention to. We would be walking together down the aisle and, if I didn't screw this up, maybe one day he and I would be walking down the aisle! (Although my heart was strongly tied to someone else, I decided to give this whole thing a try. Go for a swim in uncharted waters, if you will.)

We all met in La Mesa and hellos were exchanged and although it wasn't love at first sight, this guy was the only one who wasn't taken or who was available. Everyone else was out of my league, age range, dating someone or married. He was nice, good looking, tall and funny. We all hung out that night at Aquarius and had a lot of fun.

It wasn't too long after our first meeting that the happy couple decided to set us up on a double date. Well, they had set us up by having us walk together but this time we were actually going out on a date.

He came and picked me up at my house and I was excited. I wasn't excited with the way my father was questioning this guy. "Where are you going? When will you be back? What are your prospects?" It was mortifying. We got out of there as soon as we could.

It was such a fun evening. Possibly one of the most fun of my life. We went to Coronado where they were playing "Sleepless in Seattle" out on the beach. Afterwards, we went for a walk and ended up running around the Hotel Del Coronado, opening doors we shouldn't go in, smelling the Dial Gold soap in the bathrooms and laughing-a lot.

I was home at a decent hour-he was a good boy-and I was so happy to have shared such a fun evening with my best friend.

We never really lost touch, my date and I. I saw him in a tuxedo the day of my wedding. He looked so happy and still as handsome as that first day I met him. I remember at the wedding reception he smiled at me and in front of over 200 guests, he told me that he was so happy I was marrying his best friend.


Part Two, continued tomorrow..........

The Christmas Stalker Steps Out Into the Light

So how creepy is it to use Zabasearch to look up the addresses of friends I have lost touch with but still want to send a Christmas Card??

Jingle Bells, Saywer Smells, Charlie Laid an Egg

For the fan who wants to re-enact Oceanic Flight 815
The Others not included

Public Service Announcement #427

Greetings, and thank you for your time.

It has come to our attention that the Christmas season is now upon us. For many of you, that Day After Thanksgiving is merely a springboard for you to allow Christmas to throw up all over your house, your life, your car, yourself (if you are of the Christmas Sweater Persuasion.) I applaud you for taking action and for getting your Christmas Lights up so fast that the rest of us feel like we have fallen behind despite the fact that it is still November.

At this time, I have an urgent matter I must bring to your attention. This Christmas season, I encourage you go through the steps of getting yourself in the "holiday spirit:" drink your red cups of coffee, bundle up in your scarves and sweaters (in 70 degree weather-gotta love Southern California!) and allow yourself to consume the holiday goodies that make the season so sweet.

However, as you go to turn on your Christmas Music, USE EXTREME CAUTION! Why? Because there is a lot of dangerous music walking around disguised as "Christmas Music" but by allowing it into your home, you could be putting your very holiday memories at risk of being ruined because of your poor choice.

Listen up people: Just because it talks about snow and things jingling, does NOT MEAN IT IS GOOD!

Be critical of your music. Beware of the tunes you allow your children to attach to their wonderful Christmas memories...if you are decorating the tree while listening to Stevie Nicks sing Silent Night, don't be surprised if they start shoving egg crate carton ornaments in their ears and running from the room screaming.

While you are driving to the mall, and "Jingle Bells" as sung by meowing cats comes on, DO NOT LAUGH! Don't turn it up and call your mother and discuss how this is possibly the funniest thing you have ever heard because it isn't. It is just sad and you, clearly, need an intervention.

May I make some suggestions? these are just a few of the Staples of Christmas Music. I do have other music I listen to but this is all a must. I have even provided the Amazon links should you find yourself lacking any of these albums.


Ella Fitzgerald-Ella Wishes You a Swinging Christmas
A fun and jolly way to get yourself in the mood. Recommended for shopping, tree decorating or any party held in the month of December


The Boston Pops Orchestra-Holiday Pops
Great music, performed beautifully and conducted by the always adorable Tiny Keith Lockhart

Harry Connick Jr.-Harry For the Holidays or When My Heart Finds Christmas
I am biased since I am a huge Harry fan but there is something about his selection of both traditional and religious songs that really conveys that he "gets" that it is Christmas

The Carpenters-Christmas Portrait
My parents did right by me since this is the CD that we always listened to while driving around looking at CHRISTMAS LIIIIIIIIGHTS!!!!! (Yelling was mandatory.) Enjoy the sweet harmonies of the brother and sister duo because you know that deep down inside you know all the words to "Close to You."


Vince Guaraldi-A Charlie Brown Christmas
I don't make it a point to insult my readers but if you don't have this CD, then you might as well say that you don't celebrate Christmas. They sell it at Starbucks for crying out loud, you don't have any excuse.

I hope that this list can give you a good base to good, quality Christmas music. Don't settle for second rate--immerse yourself with only the best.

And Merry Christmas

A Question for the Ages

Why do I even search for an airtight container for the stuffing.....




.............when I know it won't last long enough to see midnight?

The One With Two Sick Kids

The Plan Was:

french toast
donuts
the zoo
family time
naptime
grandma sisi time
kids stay overnight at grandma sisi's
mommy and daddy ALONE time (wink, wink)

The Plan Became:

fevers
sleepless night
hot and achy sweet boy
french toast
movietime at home
thermometers, tylenol, ear drops
naptime
more movies
add one more hot, fever kid to the bunch
bathtime
early bedtime for all


Poor Nate the Great was sick and then the Goose decided to join in the fun. Thankfully, after a doctor's appointment today, he is much better and does not have an ear infection OR pink eye like we thought. And despite our change in plans (and much like my friend Michelle) I found joy and thankfulness in the togetherness of my family.

Giving Thanks For the Little Things...

...Like the new grocery carts at my Vons.



And I am thankful for all of you as well.

May your Thanksgiving remind you of your blessings.

The One Where We Disturb All The Fishermen

Ahhh, Saturday. Day in which you loaf around on the couch, band together to fix your house or attempt the picture perfect "Family Outing." Because David and I had already met our quota for loafing that week and because fixing things sounded like too much work, we decided to opt for the Norman Rockwell Picturesque Saturday Activity.

It started out as a hike around Poway Lake but when Nathan tripped over Daddy's foot and BLOOD STARTED POURING OUT OF HIS KNEE (not really) our day was quickly turning into "How Early Can We Lay Them Down For a Nap" Day.

We decided to rent a boat with a little outboard motor and go for a ride around the lake. It was such a beautiful day! The sky was so blue, it was so peaceful out on the lake.......and then The Zabs showed up!!

The kids loved the boat, hated the fact that we were not going to be rowing for the next hour and Lucy was so excited about her "Special Boat Jacket." We loaded everyone into the boat and, miraculously, no one fell in. (Not even me!)

We drove around the lake and talked about how to be quiet and not stomp in the boat. See, Poway Lake is also a fishing lake and as we made our way to the middle of the lake, we traversed the veritable slalom course of fishermen. As we passed them, David waved at one of the fishermen who responded by turning his head and muttering something to his friend. Oops.

Nathan had fun helping David drive the boat. He was a little wary moving around on the boat at first but after while if he wasn't driving, he was lookout and telling Daddy which way to steer. Loudly.

Lucy was....well.....she was Lucy in a boat.
And when it came time to turn in the boat, she cried because she didn't want to give away her Boat Jacket. That girl really loves her accessories.

This is Mom, I have Stepped Away From the Kitchen and Laundry...Leave a Message at the Beep

It is a late night at Target.

You see her walking so slowly, almost methodically.

She has a slightly tired look on her face but you also see a passing glimpse of peace.

Most likely she has comfy tennis shoes on, jeans, cute top and a sweatshirt and probably has her hair pulled back in a ponytail.

Every aisle, you see her. Up and down, up and down, looking at everything on the shelves but not quite paying attention. What is she doing? There is Tide,  Kleenex and a package of cookies in her cart. She's leaning on the cart and cruising.

You finish your shopping, crossing paths with the shopper every once in awhile. As you hurry along you can't help but stop and look at this woman. You watch her as she smiles a crooked smile at the woman down the aisle who is struggling with a 2 year old on the verge of a temper tantrum. She glides past and even sighs happily.

While making your way to your car, you are two steps behind her. As you watch her unlock her SUV, minivan or 4 door car, the light inside turns on revealing two car seats.

Suddenly you understand what you have been observing all evening.......

A mother, shopping without her children.
Ahhhhhhh...............

Colorado...Through the Eyes of Nate the Great

The kid has a pretty good eye!
(Ignore the fact that Colorado looks a little "Blair Witch Project-y" through the lens of a $5 camera.)

"I do my level best to keep a clear concience before God." Acts 24:16-The Message

Every step we take as mothers, as wives directly effects our family.

Each decision we make, what we have for breakfast, when we get up n the morning, what we decide to do with our days ripples down to the lives of our husband and children.

So when we make decisions that glorify God and honor Him, our family benefits from the blessings that come with that.

However, when we choose to go in the wrong direction, our family will also walk those consequences with us.

Remember this with each step you take in your walk with God each day.

Retraction. Blog Retraction.

Remember how I disowned James Bond?

Yeah, well, I am taking it back.

David and I got to go on a date last night (hooray!!) and we even went to a movie (whoopie!!) and on opening weekend of said movie (hip hip hooray!!) 007, we were ready to watch with an intensely critical eye.

You see, we have strong ties with James Bond. We had a tradition of getting together with our friends, friends and more friends and worked our way backwards through the series, 1 movie at a time. We were each in charge of snacks (how did we eat all that food??) involving some form of melted cheese (queso or molten lava), guacamole (when avocados were in season), and I was always in charge of the "sweet." I'd make cupcakes or we'd have cookies spelling out the movie we were seeing and blood red icing to dip it in. I often prepared a dossier with information about the movie and we would settle in for the delicious acting and riveting dialogue.


Some of us liked to talk during the movie (me, Scott) and some of us liked to actually WATCH the movie (Susie the Shusher! Hee hee) but no matter what, we had fun. It took two years of getting together once a month and it was unforgettable fun. We found that when we hit the Roger Moore years that a little liquor was needed to make it past the lips that would reach round the world. And we didn't absolutely hate George Lazenby.

We were even experts at the Nintendo 64 Game. Susie played it true to Bond and was a fan of the PP7, the guys could rotate through the weapons with ease, Michelle found that the more she played, the more she dreamt about it at night and I would just grab the biggest gun I could, choose the smallest villain (Oddjob) and just run around shooting people.

So when we heard about the new Bond, the blonde Bond, the possibly not handsome crinkly faced Bond, we were not pleased. E-mails flew on whether or not we would see the movie or even endorse it. We mostly agreed that we would hold a "wait and see" view so we could fully form our opinion.

Opinion formed.
I loved the movie.
I love the new Bond.

He spends a lot of the movie with his shirt off: this is a good thing. I could watch him run all day (and I think he could if he needed to.) And he made me laugh.

This Bond film showed him achieving his 007 status, making mistakes and how he became the charming but hard hearted man we all know and love.

If the Broccoli family had tried to make a move like this with my beloved Pierce Brosnan, it would not have worked. It would have been too much like watching my Dad play cards and kill people. Daniel Craig is NOT my Dad. And that is good.

So, check it out for yourself. Enjoy the Bond-ness of Daniel Craig. Bask in the M-nicity of Dame Judi Dench. Miss the Q-tastic gadgets. (My only complaint about the movie although it does make sense with the story line.)

Oh, and one last thing: DON'T SIT IN FRONT OF THE OLD COUPLE WHO NARRATED THE ENTIRE MOVIE AT FULL VOLUME!!

Confession.

I had a brownie for breakfast today.
This is NOT a part of my eating plan.

The Perfect Day

I want to sleep in, not break up fights.

Come downstairs after a long shower and eat some really cold cottage cheese...
Watch a little TV, go for a walk.

Eat some lunch and watch more TV with my feet up--
then take a nap .

Get a pedi and then have dinner at Mimi's all by myself.

After that I will wander in Barnes and Noble and find the next perfect book.

Go home, pop the cork on a bottle of wine and read my new perfect book outside with a glass of wine and a nice cigar.

Take a bath and then go to bed.



Ahhhhhhhhhhh. I am relaxed just from typing all that out.

Duh Duh Duh Dun, Duh Duh Duh Dun, Punch Punch

One of my favorite parts of the day is naptime.

Duh, Blogging Genius.

Shut up.

I love naptime because it is when I indulge in one of my mostest favorite Guilty TV Pleasures ever:

I am watching it with two other friends and every day as we all catch up, we MySpace each other all about what is going on. (Oh yeah, we are all Moms. We should really know better but indulge me in my juvenile behavior.) Some of my favorite realiations:

I am so in love with Steve Sanders right now.

I like Dylan and Kelly together more than I thought I did.

Donna kisses like a big sucker fish (credit to Jordan)

and

I am going to be so sad when this show is over.

The series is almost done! What will I watch? What will my girls and I talk about?? I have been trying to think of other shows we could watch. Saved By the Bell? Melrose Place?

Suggestions anyone??

Ten on Tuesday

1. Nathan had school pictures today and he won't give me a straight answer when I ask him if he made a smiley face or a silly face. That's what I get when we talk the whole 12 minute drive about different kinds of silly faces.

2. Icy/Hot is the nectar of the gods.

3. So is Advil.

4. I need yooooooooooooooogurt.

5. I miss Project Runway.

6. This made me laugh and this contained the phrase "bizarrely mentally handicapped half-handlebarred mustache cowboy looking creature" which also made me laugh so hard that it hurt. If you don't regularly read this guy, start.

7. I am an aunt to a dog. He is the sweetest dog and his name is Topper but David nicknamed him Topper T which fits so well that I can't imagine NOT calling him Topper T. Now if I can only teach him how to balance things on his head like Former Congressman Chuck.

8. I can't stop dreaming about walking. It is like when you spend the day at the beach or on a boat and when you hit dry land you can still feel the rocking of the sea.

9. I am so in love with my son that I can hardly stand it:
After the walk, I was standing around after closing ceremonies with my family and a few friends. Nathan came over and I picked him up.
He said, "Mommy I missed you."
And I said, "Really? You did?"
He stopped. cocked his head one bit to the side and looked so deeply into my eyes as if that was all I had to do to see the answer to the question. I don't think I will ever doubt him again.

10. I think I might turn on "Dancing With the Stars" tonight just for the Mario Lopez-ness of it all.

"Thank You For Your Support" -Bethany

Have you ever wondered what walking in a sea of pink would be like? Or how many times you would laugh at breast puns? Or even if it is possible to walk 20 miles, sleep in a tent and then wake up to do it all over again?

It is. And let me tell you, it is amazing.

My participation in the Breast Cancer 3-Day Walk in San Diego November 10-12 began on a January evening when my friend Amy said she had signed up and would be walking for her mom. My mind went to those I loved who had fought breast cancer and won and a few who had lost their battle: specifically my godmother Susan Armstrong who I loved so very deeply as well as my father’s mother who also put up quite the fight when cancer hit her body. “I don’t want to rust out, I want to wear out.” I was in.

That is when I started bugging all of you for money. I also started training-walking weekly with my friend and wondering if the 3-Day was going to live up to all it’s hype.

As I gathered supplies and my support came in, I was amazed by the number of you who accompanied your donation with a note telling me of the people you knew who had battled breast cancer. It is hard to find someone who has not been directly affected by this disease! It encouraged me to know how many of you believed in me enough to put up your own money to get me to the starting line.

The 3 days of walking are ones I will never forget. They will be with me forever for so many reasons. I had moments of strength as I faced the largest hills I have ever had to physically climb and MADE IT! I crumbled at times under the pain of twisted ankles and tired lungs. But I flourished when I had day after day of victory of returning to camp on Day One and Two and then crossing the finish line on Day Three.

The conversation between walkers was often the same. We talked about if it was our first or fifth 3-Day walk, if we were from out of town and then, finally, who it was we were walking in honor or remembrance of. It was hard to listen to the stories sometimes but always inspiring because all of us sitting at the breakfast table or waiting in line for the showers knew we were DOING something. Not letting something happen to us or those we love.

On Day Three, we were walking the streets of Hillcrest. Passing posh shops and shaking hands with people who were happy to see us there. At a stoplight while we waited for a “walk” sign, a city bus pulled over and the (big and burly) driver jumped out. He approached one of the walkers, said something her and then gave her a big bear hug. I caught up with her to find out what happened. She told me that he said his mother died from breast cancer just the month before and he said “Thank you for walking for her.” He was quickly back in his driver’s seat and a buzz among the walkers passed as we all shared the story with the people we were standing near. I looked back and saw this man wiping the tears from his eyes.

As I continued walking, I realized that I wanted to change my answer to the question, “Who are you walking for?” I realized that I signed up for this walk and raised the money in honor of my grandmother and my godmother. But I took each step, I walked 60 miles for people like that bus driver. To let them know their loved ones are not forgotten and will not be forgotten. To give them hope that we may live in a world without cancer. That I will never have to worry about my daughter, my son’s wife or their children suffering from the effects of cancer.

So it is on behalf of the bus driver that I send you this thank you letter. It is on behalf of my friend Amy’s mom who is a survivor and on behalf of the friends I have who have survived because of the money raised in walks like these. I thank you on behalf of the children of America who will have their moms, grandmothers and aunts with them longer because of the research your very dollars will help to advance.

I also thank you, on a more personal level, for the personal journey I was able to go on through this walk. I have emerged with a stronger love for myself and an admiration for what one person can do. I appreciate all of my friends and family more and feel such a love from all of you that I could never fully express it. So please read this letter between the lines. Read my appreciation and know that I hold all of you in a class of those who think above and beyond your own worlds. That you could see how-no matter the amount-your money and time spent praying went to serve the greater good of this world.

On the final day, all the walkers walked a Victory Walk and passed all our friends and family cheering us. It was hard not to cry when I saw my friends, my husband, I even grabbed Lucy and kept her with me. I didn’t want to let her go. We walked into a cul-de-sac and that is when they released the Survivors. Those that had walked both the 3-Day and the journey of Breast Cancer marched down the street, hand in hand. When they all gathered, I saw the other walkers all taking one shoe off and lifting it up. We all took a shoe off and lifted it high as a salute to those who were so brave and so heroic.


And today, I lift my shoe to you.
Thank you.

Bethany Zabrosky