Random Vacation Thoughts

What are the chances of getting invited back to your friends' house if your daughter maybe, kinda turned the water heater dial all the way down to "pilot light" twice?

AND


Half of this book

Plus


All of this book

Plus


All but, like 20 pages of this book (of which I will be completing once I get upstairs)

Equals : One GREAT Road Trip.

Here are a couple of pictures.....

"Look Daddy, I'm doing it!"


Rock Climbing at Lake Tahoe..."Muscles!"


"These flowers smell like 'straaaaaw-buries!'"

And finally...

A picture of a bush, taken only because it totally looks like it is flipping you off. (Photo by Scott)

Don't Tell Me Who Won The Amazing Race...I Am Not Home Yet!!

I have been in Reno, Nevada this weekend visiting friends who moved there last year. And then while we were there, other friends came and visited too!

It was a lot of fun and I love being on a trip with small children.






You know the funny thing about reading the written word is that you can't always detect the strong and heavy sarcastic tones the writer may be inferring in the sentence she just typed.

No, I am kidding. Well, half kidding. I am kidding when I am talking about the fun we had at Lake Tahoe this evening climbing on rocks and seeing Nate jump from rock to rock just like his daddy without any fear. And I am kidding when I am watching David ride a bike with Lucy in his lap and she is calling out, "I'm doing it Mommy! I'm doing it!"

However, I am NOT kidding when at 5:45am your 4 year old wanders into the room you are sleeping in and wakes you up. And then, as you talk to him (while he is NOT whispering) you find out that before he stumbled into your room, he went straight for the OTHER guest room. The one you stayed in last time you were in town. The one your friends, who arrived at 3am were sleeping in. "Don't worry Mommy, Carol told me what room you were in."

Nothing beats starting your day with a 4 year old that is not your own staring at you until you open your eyes.

Overall, it has been so much fun and relaxing (I was actually in a home and alone for, like 30 minutes) and I rode a bike for the first time since Jr. High and didn't fall off and I had a restaurant take-out smorgasbord for dinner and I sent a few questionable e-mails after too much of Scott's Lemonade and I taught my son to hang upside down on the monkey bars and I drank in the joy of Lucy reflected in the eyes of the friends I love and I snuggled on the couch with my hubby instead of sitting at my laptop and I didn't stress out that we were annoying our friends and I didn't yell as much as I usually do AND I got to see my son WRITE HIS NAME. AND mine. AND Lucy's. AND Lexi's.

Tomorrow we drive home but not after we visit the UPS Distribution Center that has our Credit Card...in an effort to be helpful, before the trip I gassed up the car and tucked the card I used for payment in the back pocket of my jeans while standing at the pump.

3 hours into the road trip, we discovered the card was still there.
And my jeans were in a puddle on the floor next to my bed…in Poway.

We called the company and they UPS’d a card to us right away. To the address I gave them where I inadvertently transposed the numbers of our friends’ address and the package was undeliverable. And we can’t really get home without the card.

I am the most helpful wife ever!
(Did you detect the sarcasm there? It was probably a little more obvious this time.)

I am tired.
So tired that I laid down in bed tonight with my sunglasses still on my head.
So tired that I discovered that I wore my underwear inside out all day.
So tired that I went to bed and forgot to blog today.

But tired like this, the tired that comes from being so happy and busy is the best kind of tired. And it brings the best kind of sleep….

…even if you are awoken at 5:45am the next morning by a 4 year old staring at you.

Here is your poem of the day…circa 1992. I am a fan of poems in couplet form. They are always successful in poetry but also leave you the room to convey a thought in a more simple structure. (Listen to me! Don’t I sound impressive?!) And, when all else fails, it provides for some very creative rhymes.

Dream of Your Kiss
by Bethany Shumate

Sometimes, when you talk to me,
I wonder what you really see.

Do you see me as a friend?
Just some girl-there till the end?

Or do you see beauty and grace?
Do you ever notice my pretty face?

See, you know we’ve been friends for awhile.
We do more than just say hi and smile.

All I have to do is give you a call,
You’ll pick me up when I start to fall.

I support you with all my heart.
Knowing, as friends, we’ll never part.

What more could I ask, I’m your good pal!
It would mean more to me if I was your gal.

Maybe someday I can tell you all this,
But for the moment, I’ll just dream of your kiss.

Bloggers Post Script: I am blogging to John Cusack in "Say Anything..." and while it is not the movie that caused me to fall in love with John Cusack, it certainly cements the fact that John Cusack should be my boyfriend.

dissapointment (notice the lack of capital letter in the title? it makes it more dramatic)

dissapointment
by Bethany Shumate, age unknown

Tulips blooming,
Windmills turning,
Breezes blowing,
Grass rustling.
Golden braids and wooden shoes churning butter on the porch.
Smiles come, lighting up the face.
A lover comes to view...
With another woman at his side.
Tears falling,
Butter spilling,
Wooden clip-clopping
from her chair to the door.

More (Parenthetical) Teenage Angst

The Forbidden

by Bethany Zabrosky, 11th Grade

We started out at friends.

(I liked it that way.)

You said something

And it threw my mind into high gear.

I think of you

In ways I never have.

It wouldn't work

(We both know that.)

But we want it so badly.

all we can do

Is be friends,

(It's okay that way)

With deeper feelings.

A Definition of Me, According to My 11th Grade Self (In Poetic Form)

More of the fun from 11th grade...this one is a direct result of the eecummings poetry study we had just completed.

I Like, I Don't, I Am
by Bethany Shumate, Grade 11

I like poetry-when I can understand it.
I like writing it.
I am pretty good.
I like doing things
I am good at.

(My name is Bethany Jordan Shumate.)

I like singing.
When I was little,
I would sing
REALLY LOUD
in my backyard.
Hoping that someone would hear me
and I would become
a famous singer.

(People call me Beth.)
I like to dance.
I am not very good.
When I took ballet,
it didn't last very long.
I wasn't in a recital.
That's okay.
I still like to dance.
(Marc calls me a Champion.)
I don't like to be made fun of,
or talked about.
But I am pretty good at it.
"Your momma's so fat..."
I know I shouldn't do it,
(especially if I don't like it,)
but I do.
(Leah calls me Beepers.)
I am a janitor.
I like to say "custodian"-
it sounds less dirty.
I like my job.
I don't like being ashamed
of my job...
but I am sometimes.
(My dad calls me Bink.)
I am a Christian.
I have been for eight years.
I am not ashamed,
or embarassed.
But I used to be.
(My name is Bethany Jordan Shumate.)

Celebrating a Blog-Tastic-a-Versary

Happy Blog-a-versary Month!

It was two years ago that I started blogging and realized how much I missed writing. Its one of those things that you get to do in Jr. and Sr. High School all the time. And then when you are done with school, you go to college and take MORE classes that involve writing and drive your husband crazy over how fast you can bust out a 10 page paper using critical analysis to assess the highs and lows of a 10 line poem. And that is when you wonder if you revealed this side of you too early in your marriage and you hope he doesn't leave you so you start talking about BMW's to distract him.

When I was in elementary school, I decided I wanted to become a writer. I wrote short stories all the time. I had love stories, I had adventures and I moistly had tales of friendship. Once I moved into Jr High School, I wrote a lot of news stories for the school newspaper. And then once high school struck, my full order of teenage angst and unrequited love was delivered and I wrote poems about the boys I "loved" and how they didn't "love" me back. I even had an ongoing story my best friend at the time and I wrote about the two guys we liked and how we got married and lived on the beach and the guys played volleyball and my best friend and I worked at Bobby McGee's as Snow White and Alice in Wonderland. (I never said the stories I write were grounded in reality.)

After getting married, my writing turned more to term papers for school and articles for the Tierra Times. Nothing too creative but still writing, nonetheless. And then, once Nate the Great came along, my writing was confined to e-mails all about my new son. And although people who met me post Nathan but pre blog didn't know my love for writing, a handful of friends and family members and specifically my husband always encouraged me to write. David is most definitely my biggest fan. If I say anything funny or tell a story that is interesting he will respond to the story and then follow up any comment with, "You should write a book about that so you can make all kinds of money and I don't have to work." Now that we have been married 10 years, it has shortened to, "Write a book!"

Needless to say, when I started blogging, he was elated. And I must say that writing and making myself write even when I don't think I have anything to say does something for me that singing, acting and photographing doesn't do. And as I met other bloggers and made some of my friends start blogging I remembered how much I looooove to write.

So, in honor of this month representing 2 years of blogging, I will be blogging every day this month. This week will be highlighting my past writings and specifically the hilarious (but terribly serious) poems from high school. Interestingly enough, I never felt the need to write the sad and melancholy poems once I met My David.

Are you ready now? For the angst? The pain? The unrequited teen-age love?
Well, here you go then! One of my first in a series of poems that I felt were so important that I put them all together in a “book” and printed multiple copies for both my mom, dad, sister and anyone else who was amazed by my depth as a writer and thinker.

JUST A FANTASY
by: Bethany Shumate

I look in your eyes
And I melt to the floor
My heart does a flop
When you walk through the door.
I get in your way,
So that you will see
All of the magic
That you bring to me.
You would be blind
Not to recognize,
All of the love
I have in my eyes.
Just say the word,
I’ll be by your side.
We’ll walk hand in hand,
Never breaking stride.
I would love you
And you would love me
Then I’d wake up and realize,
It’s just a fantasy.

Sometimes You Have to Be Reminded that You are The Sparrow

I was mad.
Like, really mad.
Seething mad.

SOMEONE had messed with MY PLANS.

And if you know anything about me, you need to know that my PLANS should NOT be messed with.

Cooking up a big batch of righteous indignation, I sped down the street to take Nathan to school hoping I could get him dropped off in time to get my favorite Starbucks drink and get back home so I didn't miss my appointment. I thought up ways I could demonstrate to my last minute guest just how much he had REALLY messed up my day and therefore MY ENTIRE LIFE.

The plan was as follows: My unwelcome guest would arrive, I would be "on the phone" telling the person on the other end how I was so sorry that I couldn't make it to her house today after all the planning we had done. I know I said I'd be there but I had no choice. We will just have to reschedule our playdate. I know, I am so sad too. Well, I have to go I guess.

How awesome is THAT?
I am amazing.

Breaking into my Inner Rant of Grandmother Sized Guilt was a small, sweet voice, "Mommy, I want to listen to 'Glory in the Highest' after 'Everlasting God'" (our newest obsession.) I agreed to my daughters request, advanced the CD to the correct track and continued my (inner silent) tirade.

I am so mad, I am so mad.

You are the first
You go before
You are the last
Lord, You're the encore

I am so mad.

All the earth will sing Your praise
The moon and stars, the sun and rain

I am so......um, what am I?

You see it was about then that my daughters sweet voice joined in the chorus of this beautiful song and she belted our my Savior's Praise.

Glory in the highest
Glory in the highest

My anger was diffused completely within the 3.5 miles to Nathan's school. And it reminded me of something so BIG that it is tiny enough to miss: God is in the little things.

Little things like a two year old's singing voice. An unexpected hug and snuggle from a child as you say goodbye. The story of snail races. A longer naptime than expected. A peaceful walk with your family.

And while many times in our day we can take these little things and stop there, they often are to prepare for something bigger in your day. God is taking these "little things" and using them to bring your regularly unpeaceful life some peace, to allow a genuine smile to pass your normally frowning lips. He is freeing up your mind and your heart so that when it is toward the end of your day and you receive news that scatters your heart in a thousand directions you can process that news and properly deal with it.

I could have been angry with God tonight, angry that He took my lovely evening with my family and destroyed it so quickly. But this is not the case. instead, I see that He has healed my spirit. He has taken care of me. He has loved me.

Look for the little things in your life.
Cherish them.
Because you never know what they are preparing you for.

And the Winner of Vaccum Attachment of the Day Is.....

All hanging lamps, all mini blinds, all screens: clean.
Attachment with the bristley bristles and hole in the middle to suck up the things I loosen from cleaning surfaces, I love thee.

The One Where I Mess With Mother Nature

There is a reason that people aren't supposed to interfere with the process of how things live, the natural process that God established in the beginning of the world.

But God also created Mothers.
Mothers who put the word nurture in the "Nurture vs. Nature" concept.

So there I was, looking out my window at the pouring rain-the April shower that was not only bringing some serious cold to our otherwise warm April but keeping ALL MY CHILDREN INSIDE. Let me tell you, 3 kids under the age of 5 cooped up in a small house all day? THAT is NOT natural.

Outside my window, I look at our newest (albeit temporary) family members. Over a month ago, 2 Mourning Doves started their family in the outside hanging planter. The babies hatched about a week ago and I see our poor mama bird, sitting in the POURING rain protecting her babies from the cold water. My toddler-soaked heart went out to her. She's just trying to be a good mama and here she is sitting in the rain!

I couldn't let it happen. Knowing full well I'd probably temporarily scare Mama from the nest, I got David's 6-foot ladder and the big camping tarp out of the garage and carried everything outside. I waited till all the kids were down for a nap so I wouldn't add chaos to my heroic rescue.

As I set the ladder up, I saw something fall off my kitchen counter. I figured the ladder had caused my giant stack of magazines to fall. I'd pick it up later. If ever. I went up the ladder and wasn't surprised to see Mama gone. I configured the tarp to hang over the gazebo the hanging planter was under and dashed back into the house.

When I got inside, the parakeets (a pair-a-whats?) we have on loan from Nathan's school were going CRAZY in their cage. I walked into the kitchen and found out why.

There was a bird in my kitchen.

Well, actually there were THREE birds in my kitchen. But only 1 of them wasn't authorized.

Somehow, in the shock of a ladder and tarp coming towards her nest, Mama bird hopped right up out of fear and instead of flying out to the big tree she usually watches me from when I am paparazzi-ing her babies, she flew INSIDE MY HOUSE.

So, there she is. Sitting on my kitchen floor.
THIS IS WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU MESS WITH NATURE! A BIRD in your kitchen!

I called David who suggested opening the kitchen window so Mama could fly out. Easy enough. Uh huh. As I headed over to the window, Mama once again mistook my help as a threat and instead of waiting patiently on the floor for me to finish with the window, she took flight once again but this time she encountered something we inside creatures call a "ceiling." Poor confused bird was crashing into the ceiling, the lights and I was doing my best to not get my eyes pecked out. (A good goal to have I think.)

She landed on the curtain rod for my sliding glass door. OPEN sliding glass door. THE door that caused this problem in the first place.

I decided the best thing to do was to be still.
I sat in the chair furthest away from Mama and I was still.
I was still for about 15 minutes.
That is often my limit.

I heard my neighbor's daughter come outside to get her brother off the bus and seeing how the stillness hadn't worked in getting the bird out of my house, I decided I might as well laugh about it with someone. She couldn't believe it and we both stood there staring at the bird which didn't make her leave either.

Seeing how sitting still and staring at the bird wasn't causing her to leave, I took further action by photographing the bird with my camera phone and sending an e-mail to all my friends and family.

THAT didn't work either! She was still in my house!

So by now, my neighbor's daughter Kenna has told her mom, Kim, all about the National Geographic going on next door and Kim had to see for herself. More staring and laughing happened (with no success) and Kim says that her ex husband will be over soon to pick up her kids and seeing how he's kind of got a farm and knows animals and stuff, maybe he will know what to do.

After spending 30 minutes of quality time with this bird, I was ready to have her leave. I haven't mentioned it yet here because this is a family blog but I did have a big concern about my houseguest.

POOP!
Birds POOP!
They poop wherever they WANT to!
And if left in my house much longer I had a feeling the poop would be showing up in my house SOON!

Kim's ex husband came in, had Kim and I stand in the kitchen while he took his baseball cap off and "herded" Mama off the curtain rod. She flew a circle around the living room and tried to go back but his hat was still there and then she flew right out the front door.

It was extremely anti-climatic.
But it ceased all my poop fears.

However, the poop fears were quickly replaced by "Birds Baby Mama Hasn't Come Home Yet" fears. Hours and hours passed and our sweet baby birds (2 of them) were huddled up and all alone. It was 4 hours later before I was able to relax and feel like, in the looooooooooong run, I really HAD helped our little bird family survive the wilds of my backyard.

When retelling the story the next day to Jeff (husband of Kim, the Halloween fall-er) I told him that I was now VERY concerned for our baby birds. When it was time to teach the babies how to fly, what if they didn't get it the first time? The nest is over CONCRETE! They could fall and break their little birdie necks! Maybe I should get some crash pads so they won't get hurt!

Jeff dropped his shoulders, shook his head, looked right up at me and said:
"They are just birds! Stop mothering them!"

How Long is The Wait For a Table?

"Where are you and Daddy going on a date?"

"I think we are gong to dinner."

"I know what you should do, Mommy!"

"Oh yeah, what's that, Nate?"

"How bout you and daddy get married again and have a baby?"

"That is cramming a lot into 3 hours, son."

You are the Everlasty God, You Do Not Faint, you Won't Grow Greary

One of David's favorite things to do with Nathan is to sit on the couch and listen to David's iPod. They each get one earbud and Nathan loves listening to "songs about God, Jesus and THE LORD."

Once Nathan is in love with a song, it is all he wants to sing. (Hmm, sounds just like his dad....AND his mom!) So on the way home from church, both kids were in David's truck and they listened to "Everlasting God" by Chris Tomlin about 15 times and when they got home, they wanted to listen to it MORE!

Let me tell you, it is the most delightful thing to hear your children singing God's praises! I snuck the camera onto the counter to capture Nathan singing along with Chris Tomlin and I had to share it with you. His lyrics are a little off but the spirit is right, wouldn't you say?

Wait, Is THAT Why I Am So Tired?

When the guy came out to evaluate and assess Nicholas and his development and looked around the house and saw Lucy, he looked back and forth between the two toddlers a few times before he asked...

"How old is she?"

"Two."

"And Nicholas?"

"Two and a half."

"So that's...."

"6 months difference, yeah."

"Wow that's.....really close."

"Yeah."

And that was all we had to say about that.

Ten on Tuesday

10. The yummy thing about the mini Resees Peanut Butter Cups is their perfect chocolate to peanut butter ratio. The bad thing is that even when you've eaten 6 of them, you still feel like eating more. (The "more" being all of the ones left in your kids' Easter Baskets.)

9. Why am I downstairs watching "Cars" and everyone is upstairs destroying the boys' room?

8. I cannot get enough of the show "Ace of Cakes" right now. I even have Mary Alice as one of my MySpace friends! You need to watch it. And then think about how YOU could TOTALLY work for Duff and his friends.

7. I think I might be getting sick. I had a chance to get some free ice cream from a friend and I completely forgot to pick it up. FORGOT. To get FREE (FREE!) ICE CREAM.

6. Tomorrow my favorite 10 year old is becoming an 11 year old and I think his mother and I aren't accepting it very well.

5. My blog-a-versary is next month. I should plan the celebration now so my blog can know how much I really do love it. Something that will be the equivalent to dressing the blog up and getting it slightly drunk on wine. Hmmm, a blog a day maybe? What do you think?

4. Man, this movie really does crack me up. I guess I can leave it on. Wait, is "Ace of Cakes" on right now? No. OK, "Cars" it is.

3. I belong to an online photographers forum for local San Diego photo-bugs like myself. I entered their monthly contest with a photo that I plan to enter this year in the Del Mar Fair and I lost by 1 vote. I am super sad about the loss but very happy that I did not stoop so low as to blog about it earlier and talk all of you into voting for me. (But I WILL stoop to publicly patting myself on the back.)

2. My latest blog obsession is this lady right here. Enjoy the Crazy. Enjoy the Purl. Yard Farts!

1. I am pleased to introduce you to the self proclaimed Butterfly King who rightfully gained his throne by grabbing the crown and wings first and running around declaring, "I'm the Butterfly King! I'm the Butterfly King!" (Or, when not interpreted for you, "I duh Buttuh-fi Ting!")



**I had some lovely comments (11 to be exact) left from a spammer so I had to republish the blog. (Are we switching to TypePad yet?) But I did link to the baby picture I referred to in the post. Check it out!**

The One With The Ham

While watching "Charlotte's Web" during dinner…...


"Mommy why did the rat say they were saving Wilbur for Christmas dinner?"

"Because some people at pigs at Christmastime."

"Oh no, Mommy. I don't eat pigs. No.




Can I have more ham for dinner?"

10 Years of Romantic Conversations

"You know, David, as part of our 10 year plan, you have the option to trade me in for a different model."

"Hmmm, I don't know, I've got all the seats worn in,
I know where all the knobs are...

...if I tap the dash just right the radio turns on."

And We All Made It Home. 3 Toddlers, 1 Mommy, 8 Sore Feet, 1 Numb Brain

Gas to get to Disneyland: $40

Peanut Butter and Honey Sandwiched Packed For Lunch: $6

1 Mickey Mouse Hat to Make a Total of Three in the Family: $9.50

Finding Out That if I Had to Do it All By Myself with Three Kids (2 2-year olds and 1 4-year old) Again I Totally Could:

PRICELESS

Oooh, the Disneyland Parking Structure! THE place to grab lunch.

.....

Nicholas gets his Mickey Mouse Hat!

.....

Waiting in line for the rides...look at the early morning energy!

.....

Snack break. Goldfish Crackers (NOT the whole wheat kind, thank you Snobby Poway Moms From My Kids Clubhouse), Candy, Lemonade and French Fries. Am I raising the healthiest kids ever or what?!

.....

Totally wiped. Everyone fell asleep...for about 20 minutes.
(all pics taken via cameraphone)

.....

P.S. I know, I'm crazy.

 

I Really am a Sucker for Gingham

"So what is this one about?"

"I'm not sure, I have seen parts of 'An American in Paris' but I have never sat through all of it."

"What? I thought you'd seen all of Gene Kelly's movies."

"Well, I have seen a lot of them but I am a fan of the 'Guy Meets a Girl and They Fall in Love and Go to a Clambake' kind of American musical. You know, the kind with all the gingham and dancing."

"I think they still have clambakes."

"Really?"

"I don't think they have the gingham, but I can promise you there will be clams."

Is This the Line For Regaining My Youth?

Here I am, waiting in line at 6AM in 39 degree weather.

10 years ago, this could have been a picture of me waiting in line to see
Audio Adrenaline

or U2.

5 years ago, it might have been me waiting in line for tickets to the lastest Star Wars Movie.

But not today.
Today I stood in line at 6AM in 39 degree weather, with 40 other people...

...to get my kid in the Monday/Wednesday/Friday AM Spot for pre school.
My how parenthood changes things.

Airing My Oddities

Some of my neater and tidier and compulsive friends find an untidy person like me to be an enigma.

You see, I may go a week without properly seeing my kitchen counter. Over 7 days occasionally pass before the bathroom gets scrubbed. (But not much longer--I am not THAT gross.) And there has been more than one occasion where the laundry has been taller than me.

But no matter the state of my living room floor..........

 

My daughter's Caboodle will ALWAYS be organized.

You Are Now Entering a No-Spill Zone

Hi, my name is Bethany and I am a Sippy Cup Addict.

You know those moms who say-happily-"Oh we finally broke little Steve of the Sippy Cup. He only uses a regular cup now."

To that I say, "WHAAAAT?"

Sippy Cups are a gift from God. I think they are even talked about in the Bible. After all, in 2 Samuel 14:14a, it is said: "Like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be recovered, so we must die."

That's God telling us to use Sippy Cups or we have to die!

Now that we have added another Sippy Cup user to our family, I was thrilled to have the excuse to BUY MORE! Couple that with Price Club (yeah, that's what I said) selling 4-packs for only $5 and it has only fed my addiction.

So, I am here to declare that my children will continue drinking from Sippy Cups. They will enjoy milk in the morning, water in the evening and the convenience of a life lived without being yelled at by their neurotic anti-spill mother (at least for spilling.) They will thank me when I insist on them taking Sippy Cups in their lunches for first and second grade. After all, their beverages will be so easy to get to with no fussing with the straws stuck to the back of a Capri Sun pouch. I think when the kids go to Sr. High, I will see if my mom can sew some really hip looking cozy's for them and they can be the envy of all their friends. And then, on Nathan's wedding day, his bride (Alexis, right?) will THANK me when they use Sippy Cups to take their first communion as a couple and she doesn't dribble any grape juice on her wedding dress. Am I not the best Mother in Law EVER?

One day at Target, a young couple was registering for their coming baby and they stood in front of the great wall of cups looking confused. I, in my great wisdom but humble demeanor, offered up my assistance. I pointed out the better cups and why they wanted them. I told them that if they wanted to hear the whole presentation with accompanying slide show, they were welcome to wait a moment while I set everything up. The soon-to-be-mommy was so appreciative-really, she was!-but then offered some counter points of her own as to why the cups I was recommending were, in fact, NOT the best Sippy Cups Ever Made. I told her that I hoped her baby was ugly and I left.

So there you have it. My addiction is aired out there for all to see. I loves me the Sippy Cup AND I am a Sippy Cup Snob. It must be Playtex. It must be the insulated kind.

Only in this will you achieve Sippy Cup Perfection.