Morning By Morning New Mercies I See

"I want to make God smile
and I want to live before others
so when they see me, they will smile at God."
-Amba Mputela

I am not a collector of quotes. However, there are one or two I turn to often as guides for my life or reminders to me. The quote above could be summed up as my life's mission. And, unfortunately for this world, the woman who said this once at my church passed away a few days ago. She was a strong presence in my life and although I have only spoken with her 4 or 5 times, she was in my mind often.

Dr. Amba Mputela was a missionary to the Ivory Coast and was-as someone perfectly phrased it today-a "spiritually charged" woman. She was living her life and giving her gifts and talents to the work of the Lord and for the people of Abidjan whom she loved so very much.

I don't recall all of her story but I know that her journey from young girl to doctor to missionary was one full of trials and difficulty. Her story was amazing and she would captivate a room when she came to speak.

When I first met her, she was visiting Vista Grande and I had just begun dating David. When she met him, she pulled me close to her and told me that "he is a very special man" and she told me that I would marry him.

It was 5 or 6 years later that I saw her again. David and I were married and had been trying to get pregnant with no success. We were frustrated and unsure if we had "a problem" or not. I was at a women's conference and was excited to see Amba again. She remembered me and was happy to hear I had, indeed, married that very special man. She asked if we had kids and I told her some of our troubles. She was quiet for a moment, placed her hand on my stomach and told me I would have a baby soon. It was only a few weeks later that we got pregnant with Nathan.

The last few years of Amba's life was a battle between her strong desire to continue her ministry and care for her body who kept repeatedly failing her. She spent time here in the States and had only just gotten the okay to go home to the Ivory Coast when she fell ill and passed away.

I praise God that He gets to spend time with Amba now. I an thankful that she is pain free and can sing hymns in her strong and beautiful French-African accent directly to her Savior. And I look forward to singing with her again one day.




This is my last post for NaBloPoMo...it is not how I expected to end this month of blogging, blogging, going to bed and almost forgetting to blog, and more blogging. I am thankful for you all who have been reading faithfully and I will not be falling off the face of the earth now that I am not obligated by the potential of winning prizes.

Be well friends...I hope that today you will have a reason to smile at God.

Knock, Knock...You're on in 5, Christmas

The good news is that I didn't poison David's family.
The even better news is that I think everyone had a really nice time.

We are 3 for 3 in Thanksgivings this year and I am officially declaring the season closed.

Enjoy your leftovers. And don't let anyone steal your sandwich....with the Moist Maker.

Give Turkey the Bird

Today was Thanksgiving Number Two. (We have Three of them this year which is less than last year and since I am not nearly as pregnant or stressed, it is all 100% better.)

Today's Thanksgiving was the traditional, jeans and t-shirts and turkey and mashed potatoes and lots of loud kids in a small space kind of Thanksgiving. Last night was the refined, beautiful and lovely Thanksgiving at a gorgeous restaurant with only my kids acting like maniacs. And tomorrow holds the Why Isn't My House Clean Enough to Have Guests Over and Please Dear God Don't Let Me Ruin Both Turkeys or the Mashed Potatoes and Is It Bedtime Yet Thanksgiving. In other words, I am hosting. Pray for my in-laws.

When we haven't been eating or parenting or kind of cleaning, we have been enjoying this:



I love this show.

Holidays Make Us Do Weird Things...Happy Day of Thanks!

I hope your day was so amazing that it caused you to dress up like a pilgrim with your sister and childhood friend and then stand in the living room and take pictures.

They Meet in the Back Room of a Dentist's Office

Nathan informed me yesterday that he is going to form a "Lost Tooth Club."

You can join if you have a tooth you have lost, a tooth that is loose and that you can wiggle with your tongue or a grown up tooth coming in.

I commented that the requirements of membership sounded really strict, what would he say to the people who didn't meet any of those standards?

"Too bad, those are the rules!"

I didn't have the heart to tell him that he doesn't fall into ANY of the parameters.





But his mother does.
Maybe I will show him the club's secret handshake just to be nice.

I Think I'd Just Choke on the Bones

Nathan is spending the night at my mom's house so it's Daddy and The Girl's night tonight. We were eating dinner at the table that we also shared with Lucy's class pets that have come home with us this week: Bert and Flapper, the parakeets. (Pair a what?)

David was asking Lucy some of the specifics of caring for Bert and Flapper, including, "Do we cook them and eat them?"

Lucy replied with a giggle, "No Daddy!"

"Are you sure?"

And with a very serious face, Lucy communicated, "On the instruction sheet it says:

Step One: Give them water every day.
Step Two: Give them food every day.
Step Three: Do not eat them."

David thanked her for being specific.
I thanked God that I didn't have bean burrito come out my nose.

Love at First Squish

So one of my sweet friends had a baby on Tuesday the 11th and due to a series of illnesses and pink eye (yuck!) I had to wait to meet her today. She is so lovely and wonderful and squishy. I love the squish of a newborn baby.

Her head is full of black hair and she made that "ooo" shape with her lips as she looked up at me. I think she knew who I was.

Here is the part where you would look at the picture to the left of this text except there isn't any picture. When I got home from squishing the squishy baby, I found David running a full scan of the computer. Poor computer won't have any secrets after this scan is through. And Miss Squishy's beautiful pictures are on that computer. I promise to add them to this post tomorrow.

Now, this squishy baby has a special story to go along with her already wonderful addition to this world. Her mother told me tonight, "I have become 'That Mom' who all my friends tell their friends about." And it is true.

Miss Squishy was measuring kinda on the big side and she was hanging out in the wrong direction so a c-section was scheduled. We all waited by our phones for the text and picture to deliver the details. We expected 10 pounds.

We got 11.
11.2, actually.
That, as my husband put it, is a LOT of baby.
You are totally thinking of someone to tell about this, aren't you?

When I held her tonight, she felt familiar to me. She smelled just right. Because when babies are born to people you love, that love is immediately attached to those children. And there was definitely enough love for this sweet wonderful baby girl.

She was worth the wait.

The tiny bundle by her side stirred a little, and though it was scarcely more than the ruffling of a feather, she awoke; for the mother-ear is so close to the heart that it can hear the faintest whisper of a child.
Kate Douglas Wiggin

Ring, Ring

If you talked to me on the phone today, here are the things I'd tell you...

I got to hold a piglet today! I real live baby pig! It has a bum leg and is being nursed back to health by Nick's sister Victorria. He was wiggly, loud and preferred wrestling with Coco, the Chihuahua.

Ella didn't see me for a good chunk of the day today. She was with Daddy in the morning while I got some extra sleep. Then we went to church and Daddy had her for band rehearsal. Then I fed her a jar of food and she was off with Gwen, her Sunday Morning Buddy and then back with Daddy to head home. By the time I got home after church, she was standing up in David's lap hollering and looking around frantically for me. While it was distressing to hear, it kind of felt good. We had a nice long snuggle in The Big Red Chair.

The hubby is on the couch watching his Sunday night show-Storm Chasers on Discovery Channel. He watches it weekly with great interest even though its on late.....and it almost always makes him run late on Monday mornings. But man, it is exciting. Although the guy who just cleaned himself with the squeegee was, um, not so exciting.

You can tell it's a week of vacation when the kids don't get dinner till nine and in bed till 9:30. Please please thank me by sleeping in!!

Reality TV Shows I am currently obsessed with (excluding the best of all shows, The Amazing Race): Real Housewives of Atlanta, Top Chef, Run's House and Rob and Big. Am I alone here??

The High and Low of picking up my prescriptions at CVS today.....

Low: One of my prescriptions was $86 instead of $16! Uhhhhh, CVS? if I give you that money, I won't be able to buy necessities for my family or $86 worth of crap that I don't need at the Target Dollar Spot.

High: The 2 twelve year old boys each holding giant packs of toilet paper trying to make it look completely natural that they had 24 rolls of 1-ply and were paying in crumpled up singles and quarters. (Note to boys: 2 ply really is worth the extra money. Especially when you toss a roll up into a tree.)

Finally...
Pulled the Uggs out today. Actually, I had to hunt them down. Because when I am not wearing them, my son is! Do you think Uggs makes them in a boy's size 1?

Good Night.

PS: I can't take credit for this find-that honor belings to Cyndi and The Hutch. But man, this is one of the coolest things I have ever seen....

Go Around, April!

The following pictures represent about a week's worth of work in my life.

This is my dog April. She was so much fun growing up. We got her when I was in 5th grade and it took forever to pick a name. We finally settled on April...even though she was born in February. We just GOT her in April.

My dad got the great idea to teach April how to "go around" and walk the tiles that divided our jacuzzi from the pool. About a week of me in the jacuzzi and my dad on the outside making the sign we'd decided on for "go around" and WA-LAA (how do you spell that?) we had a trick to show people who came over to our house!

I bet even a bunch of you readers saw it once or twice too!

Slippery When Wet

Dear St. Louis, Missouri; Derry, New Hampshire and Toronto, Ontario:

If you find yourself sweating so profusely that you then have to Google a phrase like "kids who sweat a lot" or "what can i do if i sweat a lot" or "sweating a lot when sick" which then lands you on this post about a potentially unfortunate visit to my OB/GYN, then I might suggest an anti perspirant or a visit to your physician?

Also, Derry, New Hampshire, you know that you should capatalize "I" when speaking of yourself, right? It could be you tried to but your fingers were too slick from the concerning amount of sweat you are experiencing.

Sincerely,

The Blogger Who Wonders if You Are Sweating All Over your Keyboard When You Read This Blog

Attacked!

"Miss, do you want to tell me what happened?"

"Yes, I do. I was walking along, minding my own business when suddenly the Sidewalk jumped out and GRABBED me! There was nothing I could do!"

"Sounds terrible."

"It was! And THEN, Gravity all of a sudden comes and pushes me to the ground! I was traumatized!"

"Miss, might I offer you 1 rainbow bandage and 1 Hello Kitty bandage?"

*Sniff* "I'm all better now. Thank you."

"Rest assured Miss, we have captured the culprits and put them on time out. They won't be harming you again."

Zuh, Zuh, Zuh

I am a day behind with my Thankfulness list but if you really know me then you know that late is how I roll.

I am lucky to have no problem coming up with my list of Z's. In fact, consider this post a small introduction to the people I know and love...since many of them are the letter Z!

(in no particular order...really Well, maybe a teeeeny bit but only the first part. )

10. Zabrosky, David-He's the whole reason I get to write a Z in my name. He is my sweet hubby who loves me no matter what and who is so so so hot! (Really.) He says hilarious things and has such an intense love for his children that it blows my mind. He is a man of God and the leader of our household and I can't imagine trusting anyone more. Plus, he's hot!

9. Zabrosky, Nathan-He wrote his own book yesterday and it had great pictures and funny jokes. He is growing about an inch a week and I love it when he tries to convince me of things like how his mouth hurts and it is okay for me to take him out of school so he can go to the dentist. Because school doesn't really matter.

8. Zabrosky, Nicholas-I didn't know I could love a child so much who I didn't carry around for 9 months. He taught me so much at his young age and I pray that he will always feel like he has a place in our home-no matter where he lives. Plus he is possibly the funniest kid I know. That's right, I said it. And for bonus points: He will hug anyone who asks for it. And it will possibly be the best hug you ever receive.

7. Zabrosky, Lucy Joy-You wear dresses. You play tea parties. You give hugs and hand kisses when we cross the street together. You play dress up with your friend Lindsay and you watch musicals with me over and over and over. You really are the best. Even when you aren't.

6. Zabrosky, Ella Anne-My baby who started patting me and calling me "mama, mama" this week. She has brought hope to people she barely knows but when they look at her they can't help themselves-they are glimpsing the beautiful work of God the Father. Even the kind Scottish priest at the doctor's office couldn't stop himself from reaching out and giving her a blessing. And she is so hilarious when she plays with that kid in the number 9 spot.

5. Zabrosky, Elizabeth-My niece. I haven't met her yet but I love her so much! She is so smiley in the pictures we receive and I know that she is going to be a wonderful woman since she is being raised by two of the most wonderful people ever. Which leads me to....

4. Zabrosky, Susannah-...one half of that awesome parent duo! Aunt Zunah! She was over at our house the day I found out I was pregnant with Lucy and it was so cool to have her share that with us. And when Nick first came to us, she was there almost every day helping me adjust to the suddenness of having 3 kids under the age of 4 in my home. She loves God. She loves her Man. And she loves her family. And I love her.

3. Zabrosky, Jonathan, Gabriel-The older of the younger brothers. I hear the most hilarious stories and escapades from David that these 3 used to get into. Stories like starting up big bulldozers on jobsites near their home, taking bamboo and making slides out of them, and general sneaking around and getting in trouble games. Best way for boys to grow up.

2. Zabrosky, Klaus-The youngest brother who, for awhile, was such a mini David, I glimpsed what it might be like if we had a son. We had him spend the night sometimes, took him to Sea World and other places. He was a funny kid who wanted to be just like David. Now he is a young man and when David and I think about his actual age, we wonder what happened to the last 10 years?

1. Zabrosky, Mom and Dad-they built a family together and raised the young man who is now my amazing husband. They didn't shoot down the 23 and 19 year olds who came to them with the "great idea" of getting married at such a young age and instead offered guidance and advice to them. And they love their grandkids. Which is apparent after spending time with either of them. I love you guys.

I am lucky to get to have the letter "Z" in my name. But I am even more blessed to that these last 10 as a part of my family.


The Thankfulness ABC's is starting back up again! Join my friends every Tuesday and remind yourself-and the world-that there is much to be thankful for! Head over to Beyond Black and White to see the other Z lists!

Inappropriate Exfoliation

I got this really cool pre-shower loofah (or loofa?) thing for my birthday a few years ago from a very dear friend of mine. I think of her every time I use it.






Which, if you think about it, is kinda creepy.

Like Comparing Apples to...Well, Apples

I just went to Wal-Mart and bought generic brand diapers and beer.





Now I am having trouble figuring out if that makes me White Trash or a Redneck......

A Little Pink in the Eyes

Pink has always been her favorite color.......until today.

We have pink eye. Every girl in my house has it in both eyes. And while it is a major inconvenience for Ella and me, it was more upsetting to Lucy when she found out that it meant she couldn't go to her friend's birthday party today. We have been talking about the party all week, the present Lucy picked out herself has been sitting in our hallway and one night after bedtime, Lucy actually snuck out of her room so she could just look at it.

So now, instead of going to church and a birthday party, my day will be cheering up my daughter by watching (those weird and oddly animated and creepy) Barbie Movies.

Have you seen them? There is a sweetness to them and they always are promoting the whole "look inside yourself for your true beauty and goodness" message but include some sort of a villain who has an extra creepy animal sidekick. And....Kelsey Grammer! (Why is he in all of these?)

Before I go, I don't want to leave you with only a sad story of pink eyes and children's entertainment gone weird. Instead, I give you:

Puppies!!

Or I.A.W.t.B.W.B.a.O.M.G.I.a.s.T.a.I.i.t.E.o.N.Y. For Short

I think I have one every year.

The "I Almost Went to Bed Without Blogging and Oh My Gosh I am so Tired and Is it the End of November Yet?" Blog.

That's what today is.
Good Night.

No Need to Cross Check This One

Nathan is sitting on the couch, pondering the choices he thinks he has for dinner.

"Mommy, can I have a quesadilla again for dinner? Just for special?"*

"We don't have any more tortillas, Nathan."**

"Hmmmm, what else is made with cheese that I can have for dinner?"

Definitely my kid.




* = "Just for special" is a phrase I used one time. Once. ONCE. And now I hear it ALL. THE. TIME. This leads me to the hypothesis that when buying ice cream for the kids out of the blue, I could insert any phrase like "Mommy, you are beautiful and I shall always obey you" as the reason we are purchasing said ice cream and it would then stick as a magical phrase they always remember.

** = Sometimes I will still discuss the perceived dinner options to simply further the nightly delusion he has that he gets to make all the choices in his life. It's how I get my kicks.

I'll Keep My Legs Crossed While You Take a Nap

He is my firstborn-the one I "practiced" on.

The one who made all other babies look like a waste of time--after all, no other baby was as wonderful as him!

He had elfin shaped ears the first few months of his life and the top of his hair grew into one tall swirl that could be pulled up to look like a giant Shirley Temple ringlet. He would get fussy in the evenings but a bath cheered him right up. And he loved his Daddy so deeply from the very start.

And when it was time for him to be with us, Daddy is the one who wanted to go back to sleep!!

When I was pregnant with Nate the Great, we were coming up on our due date and I wasn't working. Read that: I was bored out of my mind. I had folded every onesie. I had washed every blanket. I had arranged and rearranged the baby's room. Two days before my due date, I picked my sister up from work so we could have lunch with our mom. While at Taco Bell, I found a piece of plastic of some kind in my taco and got a card worth 10 free tacos! Later that evening, we went to our friends' house for movie night. It was during the movie that we thought we had some contractions. Wrote down a few things but ultimately didn't have much to report.

I did discover something worthy of reporting when I woke up in the middle of the night thinking I'd peed my bed. Wait. that's not what that was.

"David, my water broke, call the hospital and ask them what we should do."

The reply: "Groooooooannn."

I went to the bathroom for a little while and then came back in my bedroom to a sleeping husband.

"David" I shook him harder than before, "my water broke, call the hospital."

"Grooooooannnn. Zzzz."

Back to the bathroom. And then back to a sleeping husband...again.

I went and got the phone. I placed it next to his snoring body and said, "DAVID. My. Water. Broke. Call. The Hospital. And Ask. What We. Are Su-ppos-ed. To. Do."

I returned to the bathroom.

My husband walked in and leaned on the frame of the door.

"They said take a shower, eat something and then come on in." His head hung low.

"Well, what did you think they were going to say?"

"I was hoping they'd say 'Go back to sleep and come in first thing in the morning.'"

I Might Be the Only One Who Watches This Show

Tomorrow, I am planning to meet some girlfriends for breakfast.
We will be consuming delicious bacon. I am looking forward to it terribly.

I am exhausted and ready for bed-but fulfilling my blogging obligations-save the fact that i just finished watching "Fringe" on DVR and now I find that my mind is filled with the idea of parasites that might wrap themselves around my beating heart.

Ohh that's icky.

Know what's not icky?
Joshua Jackson being witty and charming and doing something heroic to save my life.
Oh Pacey, I've got it bad for your sarcasm and wry smile.


Of course, with my luck, I will just dream about bacon. No, not Bacon. The breakfast kind.
Might not be so bad either way.

Spooning

After careful consideration and extensive examination, I have decided that my favorite of all the utensils is....


The spoon.


The big spoon is my favorite. Especially for cereal. Second is the set of tea spoons I got for my wedding. They are long and they are perfect for reaching into a container of Ben and Jerry's Vanilla Heath Bar Crunch.

The small spoon kinda makes me feel like a giant when I am eating. I generally avoid it all together.




Just like I should have suggested you avoid this blog today all together.

It's No Baby Ruth

You know, you have to be pretty desperate for Halloween Candy when you stoop to eating those Act II Popcorn Balls as a snack.






Gotta go, kernal stuck in my teeth.

How Do I Write This Post Without Making it Sound Like a Poorly Made Adult Film?

While I was taking a shower the other day, I realized that I have been taking a shower the same way since high school. Start with washing and always start with the left arm. Let's break it down...

1. You have to start with washing because your hair is up so it doesn't get body soap in it.

2. Once you have rinsed, you can wash your hair.

3. After washing your hair, you condition your hair.

4. While the conditioner is soaking in and making your hair sleek and shiny so you can look like a Garnier Fructisse commercial (who has super long hair and ties it around things?) then it is time to wash your face.

5 and 6. Rinse, rinse hair and face.

7. And now you can choose from a myriad of shower bonus activities. (No, not that kind. Well, that kind if you wanna. And if you are married.) You could shave, you could apply a form of extra conditioner, the possibilities are endless!

Showers are wonderful.

While doing Step 4 the other day, I accidentally got a little bit of face wash in my nose. Not a terrible thing except my face wash is this stuff with a cooling sensation on it so the rest of the day, it felt like I was walking around with a Halls Cough Drop shoved up my nostril. Quite unpleasant.

The lesson today, kids?
Be careful with your face wash and don't date boys who will tie your hair to a metal railing. it's just weird.

Complete Awesomeness

Got this from Maggie...





In other news....there's lots of updating going on over at the site with all the pretty pictures. And if any locals were hoping to squeeze into this weekend's mini sessions, we still have spots on Sunday.

Exer-Saucing

Three Years Ago...

Lucy Joy
9 months old
2005






Three Minutes Ago....

Ella Anne
(almost) 9 months old
2008

Mama's Note: Ella looks happier becuase she just discovered all the leftover Puffs and pieces of "cookie" she was just eating. She cleaned up!

What a good baby.

Query...

When you have a baby girl and she wears dresses, you get cute little covers-called "fanny pants" in our house-that cover her diaper when she's crawling around or kicking her brother in the head just because he exists.

However, as your baby girl becomes a big girl and she continues kicking her brother in the head just because he exists, her dresses don't come with diaper covers any longer. So you put on shorts and hope that no one can tell that they are from said brother's 3 piece pajama set.

Here's my question: Now that the winter months are upon us and we are sliding on our pairs of totally adorable striped tights under dresses and skirts, do we still need the shorts? They seem redundant since the striped tights cover the fanny in question.

We do like the tights-they show off the great calf muscles we've built up from repeatedly kicking our brother just because he exists.

Top Science Was Used to Come to This Conclusion...Pay Attention

People don't always like to share their age. I am noticing this as I get older myself. But there really is a surefire way to see what end of the spectrum people fall on and David and I are clear examples of the difference when we answer the following question:


Who is Uncle Jesse?


His answer....



My answer...


Mine is clearly the better one no matter how much David begs to differ.

And here is my proof:

My Punkins

I am so behind in my picture postings that NaBloPoMo will serve as catch up time.
Here are my punkins...Nick, Lucy, Nate and Ella. We got 1 picture out of 30 with everyone looking in the same direction. And 1 picture of Nathan shoiwng us how he can hold Ella with no hands. (I think the kid likes to see me freak out.)




Also coming in November, The pictorial Adventures of the Class Turtles!

You Read Me Like a Book

I read.
I will read everything printed.
I will read and re-read my favorite books.
I am a re-reader.

It is my experience that you either ARE or you are NOT a re-reader. I would rather buy a book than get it from the library because I also choose books carefully and most everything I buy I am going to like and therefore re-read. I have been that way since I was a child and even wore through my first copy of "Charlotte's Web."

I love fiction especially. Not necessarily a love story but something that will be a journey. I love Maeve Binchy's beautiful intricate storylines and stunning descriptions of her homeland, Ireland. (I will go there someday!) Being a lover of snark, I enjoy almost everything by Jennifer Weiner. If you want to see amazing things done with the English Language in an accessible manner, pick up Annie Dillard. And start with my personal favorite, "An American Childhood." And if you want someone to look directly into your soul and then describe them it paper, read Anne Tyler. And then if you want a scientific adventure and hold what could very well be a movie right in your hands, Michael Crichton is for you.

All of this is to show you that while I AM a reader, I am terribly unread when it comes to the classics. I have never picked up Jane Austen...but I did read "The Jane Austen Book Club," does that count? I picked up "Little Women" once and just never actually read it. Although I know part of my motivation is knowing that it doesn't end the way I think it should and that I won't get to see Christian Bale while I am reading the book. The list could continue....

I think this coming year-beginning with our annual trip to Reno in which I get a total of almost 20 driving hours in which to read (yes, Sooz, we are coming!) I will pick up some of these classics. I want to be the well rounded reader I know I can be.

So, Internet, what am I missing??

I Get By With a Little Help From My Friends

Lest you think I am NaBloPoMo-ing alone, I thought I'd encourage you to visit my fellow bloggers-and good friends-who are also NaBloPoMo-ing. (It kinda makes me giggle every time I type it.)

So visit my blogging friends...leave a comment...become a regular reader! Because I love my friends and I think you will too.

In no particular order...

Carol

Michelle

Susie

Angela

Sooz

Deanne

Lori

Amy

Cyndi and The Hutch

Heather

(did I miss you? let me know!)

The Candy Round Up

Well, we canvased the neighborhood and the facts are as follows...

-We hit more houses this year than ever before. Longer legs and the high fructose corn syrup siren's song seemed to motivate the walking despite the lack of naps.

-Storm Troopers do NOT wear tennis shoes. They prefer brown flip flops.

-The Baby Ruth is completely absent from the candy haul this year. I am severely disappointed.

-A black cat missing her headband ears is still cute with eyeliner drawn whiskers.

-When you are cute and have curly hair and are wearing an Alice in Wonderland costume, people will give you more candy than your Storm Trooper escort. Honest. I saw it happen at almost every house. (World, Lucy DOES NOT need more candy. I know she's cute. I know she has freckles abundant and that she smiles at you in a way that makes life worth living but if you keep giving her sugar, I will send her to live with YOU.)

-But somehow the Storm Trooper pulled in a full sized candy bar and Alice only had, well, twice as much candy.

-Following the lead of some lawmakers, the child with the most candy will be more heavily taxed than the one with the least.